Today, I felt sorry for the weird chick at work that everybody avoids and decided to initiate a conversation with her. She interrupted me mid-sentence to tell me about her vaginal odor problems, before shoving her hand into my chip packet and inviting herself to dinner at my house. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my new office mate offered to let me smell her deodorant. This was after clipping her nails, before pulling out her needle point project, and while complaining how overworked she is. FML
Today, I was stuck with a coworker all morning while she had the "front farts." I moved to a different area after lunch, only to have another coworker start talking loudly about her boyfriend's skin tags, and how he likes to have her bite them off. I'm so disgusted but afraid to report it. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom when the girl in the stall next to me started asking me how I was doing. Thinking it was weird but not wanting to be rude, I answered her questions. Halfway though our conversation she said: "Hold on, the girl in the stall next to me thinks I'm talking to her." FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me while I was at work. She did so by telling me she has a yeast infection. FML
Today, I farted in my office, assuming nobody would come in until the smoke cleared. The new girl then came in to introduce herself. She had her hands on her nose the whole time, while we both awkwardly tried to ignore the stank elephant in the room. FML
Today, after doing inventory at my job, I was approached by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute. I tried talking to her, but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker. Now she assumes that I'm "special". FML
Today, another employee scolded me for being "socially awkward". The same employee who just before had a 10 minute discussion with a client about her poop. FML
Today, I was finally able to get to know a girl at university who I'd been eyeing up for months. We had a nice conversation. We discovered that we live in the same area, and so we talked about that. I told her that the little restaurant under my house was really disgusting. Her parents own it. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant waiting for a table. Some lady walked by, smelling like BO and patchouli oil. I attempted to cover my nose with my sweatshirt, but I thumped a small girl in the process. FML
Today, while sitting in a bar, I offered to buy the drunk chick sitting next to me a drink. She was a lot more inebriated than I thought, because she looked at me with bloodshot eyes and cheerfully responded, "There's a rotten smell in my vagina!" FML
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Top comments
kooochris1995 14
At least your not a dick! Even though now she probably won't leave you alone forever.
datoismyname 22
At least she didn't stick her hand down your pants.
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Comments (192)
chels1994 11
Well it was a nice gesture...try to politely tell her you don't know her that well and you'd like to get to know her a little bit at a time...if that doesn't work, you're on your own
RandomNchic 1
Happened to me once and ended up getting stalked ... FYL OP ... F ... Y ... L
enjoymt 0
At least she's honest not like other girls
d3sigN8t3dDruNk 1
Now you know why shes avoided! Serves you right! Nice guys always finish last.
Dirty_Minded_FML 2
Bone her
MagicallyFat 12
You know that meme that jets off saying "nothing to do here". That should be you right now
RedCamaro10 0
Did you ever think that maybe there was a good reason everyone avoided her?
Akharr01 5
Mhm, give her your collegues address
skyeyez9 25
i can hear that convo: OP: Hi weird girl: Holy moly my pussy stinks. Here smell my fingers!! OP: O.O weird girl: Ohhhhh bbq chips my favorite (reaches hand into bag with stinky fingers). OP: still has the O.O expression weird girl: I havent had a homecooked meal in ages. Since we're sould mates now, we should eat dinner together tonight. OP: uhhh ummm welll. O.O weird girl: I looked up your address on the work directory. I will be over at 6pm tonight! OP: {wondering wtf just happened}
Chad_the_Brony 0
I don't know if we have Vagisil in Oz, but we have something similar. I don't really know. I'm a guy with no girlfriend.... Foreveralone.jpg