Today, I actually took pleasure in sniffing my armpits after two days of not showering. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up from the most satisfying dream I've ever experienced. Sex related? Nah. I just needed two hands to pull a massive booger from my left nostril. FML
Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML
Today, my dormant eczema decided to come back with a vengeance - on my scrotum. I work in an open office and can't scratch unless I repeatedly run into the restroom. FML
Today, it's been two weeks since my parents went crazy with their attempts to save on the water bill. Every time I want to take a shower, I have to ask them first. Let's just say I've had to resort to taking sponge baths in public bathrooms to keep my B.O. under control. FML
Today, I tried to wash my cat in the shower, conveniently naked myself. He disapproved, scratching my man-parts and nicking a vein. I just got back from the hospital with an infection, swollen nuts, and a hole in my butt for which I had to get a shot of antibiotics. FML
Today, I took the dog for a 45 minute walk/jog. She sniffed everything on the ground like she always does. She marked her territory twice, then we finally got home. As soon as I took her off the leash inside, she ran to the kitchen and took a dump right on the kitchen mat. FML
Today, after cleaning the whole house, I still couldn't get rid of the foul smell. Later, my roommate revealed his new place to "stash and dry" his socks: The ventilation ducts. FML
Today, I went to the doctor to inquire about the rash I've been getting in my underarms, behind my knees and sometimes on my face. Turns out I'm allergic to sweat. I'm a varsity rugby coach, gym teacher, and I just shelled out a stack of cash to get a sauna and steam room installed in my house. FML
Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML
Today, I used my vaporiser to make my house smell like lavender while I went to work. My brother thought it would be funny to pee inside it. My whole house now smells like pissy lavender. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
pancakerocks 1
intresting. i take joy in smelling myself after i shower
krustacea 1
I've done that.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (230)
Hubol 11
At least you don't ********** to it. Don't be as ashamed as I am.
Fmlsea 28
dude soap and water do lovely things .
jraxxo 1
Me Gusta
alsgirl 24
Ewwww
BulletCatcher12 0
Ok tho, can we all honestly say we've NEVER done something similar? It's gross, but c'mon, you've never been intrigued by the way your body smells?
rhymes4days 2
no...no body does this...if i smell bad i wash and thats IT...smh
juanitoww 5
That is gross
jessebp 0
Perhaps a weird fetish
davek 36
You are Foul Bachelorette Frog, and I claim my five pounds.
BG_caligrown 0
lmao. yu too?
DaMan25 4
That's ****** up