Today, my in-laws kept mocking me for being "too clean" because I take a shower every day. They think I'm weird and kept saying things like, "Be careful when you hug your daughter, she might squeak!" and calling me names like "water-wasting bitch." They haven't stopped all day. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my not-yet-even girlfriend dumped me in front of her family, as they all mocked and laughed at me because of my pointless and ridiculous "quirks". I'd told them that I shower and change into fresh clothes every day. I'd also said do not wipe after I poop, but I wash, soap, rinse, and dry. FML
Today, I'm staying with my in-laws. I'm obsessive about cleanliness and neatness. They're candidates for a certain show about hoarders. I want to shower in bleach. FML
Today, my friends confronted me and told me that they no longer want to visit my house because my dog smells really disgusting. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the smell is actually my parents, who have been trying to "save water" by only showering once a fortnight. FML
Today, my family had dinner with my future in-laws for the first time. After a bottle of wine to herself, my mother loudly insisted that I'm out of her will. Apparently, I "molest towels" and leave them to "fester for days" in my "den of depravity." I'm sure they'll give me their daughter now. FML
Today, like everyday, I have to ignore the mould in the bathroom, cat shit stuck to the dining room floor, and dirty dishes in the kitchen courtesy of my never-cleaning sister, but today she bitched at me for being gross and unhygenic for double dipping the ice-cream tub, and everyone agreed. FML
Today, like every time I visit the in-laws, my father-in-law is driving me crazy. He gets all holier than thou sometimes, and even my mother-in-law agrees he just talks to hear himself speak. It gets so bad that I resort to cleaning their house to ignore him. At least then he leaves me alone. Starting their dishes in 5. FML
Today, I was called gross by my mother for not cleaning my bathroom. I normally clean it every day, but today it looked clean, and I really needed a break. FML
Today, my parents kept overreacting over stupid stuff during dinner. I found a hair in a dish, so I removed it myself. My mom goes, "Is that a hair? Is it?! I'll get rid of it!" I told her that I'd already done it myself. Then, because I bit my nail once, my dad constantly kept asking if I was OK, even though I'd said I was. He wouldn't stop! FML
Today, my mom revoked my shower privileges for a week, all because I'm “using too much water.” I'm the kind of person who will smell like garbage after one skipped shower. FML
Today, in the entire half-hour since my mother-in-law reached our home, she's inspected and criticised every aspect of our home, despite things being spot clean. And sermoned me non stop on how to "live". My husband still wonders why I don't want her visiting. It"s going to be a long two weeks. FML
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Top comments
TGKat 13
I think your in-laws have yet to escape medieval times and come to the present, OP. FYL
XBurytheCastleX 25
For a present, give them some body sprays and deodorant. Let them know they need it. Revenge
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Comments (159)
Caelrona 8
My immediate comeback would have been "How about you don't hug my daughter/your granddaughter because I would hate to have to give her a flea bath, you filthy pigs." I would then have either left (if at their house, or public) or told them in no uncertain terms to GTFO and not ever come back (if at my own house.) You didn't address how your spouse reacted, but if they didn't back you up or defend you then you should give some serious thought to the gene pool you are letting your children swim in, and consider pouring in some bleach by removing some unnecessary in-laws.
xSkittle 16
Taking a shower everyday isn't good for your skin actually..
raphanne_fml 33
That's why moisturizer exists... Just put some on your skin after the shower.
Ksweety_fml 27
Damn, they mad because you wash your ass everyday? Wow...
Chevydude44_X 12
Don't feel weird, I take 2 showers per day!
trellz17 19
Calling you a "water wasting bitch" is really harsh and unnecessary.
skittyskatbrat 19
Might be time to cut down the visits with them... a lot. They sound stinky and mean.
1947Chevy 17
Are they from Europe. I know some areas over there that's still common.
mattyiscool123 26
At least your not too dirty
donkinator 24
i too shower everyday, i don't understand how you couldn't... i do live in queensland australia where the average temp is 30 degrees celsius. its so muggy most of time you'd smell pretty ripe if you didnt shower every day
evildemonchild 18
Nothing wrong with being clean ^_^