Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I was in a stall in a public restroom. Someone came in and started using one of the urinals. Somehow, before I knew it, I found I had just loudly whispered, "SOMEbody's taking a piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss." FML
Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML
Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
Today, while in a public restroom I could hear a guy having his way with his hand. He was quoting verses from the Bible. I was in a cubicle and he was at the urinal. I was too frightened to leave. This went on for a very long time. FML
Today, I was in a bathroom stall peeing. Shortly after, I heard a couple enter the bathroom, both extremely drunk. They then had sex standing up against the stall I was in, blocking my only exit. I had to sit, wait, and listen as both parties finished. FML
Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML
Today, my thigh was itchy, so I went into a bathroom stall to scratch it. I, for some reason, moaned out loud while doing it. After that, the men's bathroom went completely silent. FML
Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML
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Top comments
ilikeyouuu 0
I would have said, in an uber gay voice, "wanna do me next?!". lmao
Averizzle 0
Join him.
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Comments (156)
spez86 0
hahaha that's called a number 3 haha
KRYPTON1T3 5
win!
jeffcuhz 0
aha you shoulda just let out a nice loud fart! Lmao
blackirish44 0
my thoughts exactly
caligurl10 0
Apolloyn 0
u should've gave him the Haiti Airstrike
ilikeyouuu 0
I would have said, in an uber gay voice, "wanna do me next?!". lmao
brannyh 0
Ideas like that tend to backfire, Like if he responded "yes"
Cthulu 0
You should have sneaked out of your stall quietly, then slammed your body against his stall's door as hard as you could, while screaming as loud as possible. Then run out of the bathroom as he pisses (not jizzes) all over himself.
Bugatti_Veyron 1
so whenever you tried to leave he would run out of the stall, pick you up, and throw you back into your stall? man, that must have sucked, not being able to leave and all!
ImaginaryFoe 1
Win, for the comment and the pic.
HamsteronA 0
fail, for the pic
JrRacer4007 0
And dont forget you get picked up while he has a raging boner! Haha
ImaginaryFoe 1
Why didn't he smell anything? Unless that's what he was using to get off...
ilikeyouuu 0
eww...
Prestigex 0
Fap Fap Fap.
Invioletlight 0
Some people can't help but plop in a public toilet - some of us have jobs and aren't exactly kicking around the house all day, available to use our own crapper if we need to. If I have to plop in a public toilet and someone is listening I fart realllly loudly and they always end up leaving super fast. Then it's a win/win because I'm: 1: Pooping with privacy 2:Stinking up a bathroom other than my own at home!!!!
omgwtffmmfl 0
Sen Craig?
doink 0
Win.