Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year-old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my son's "favorite" teacher went on a tirade criticizing my "awful" parenting. About two months ago, my son got her fired after he reported her to the principal for forcing him to miss out on lunch to finish a project. Apparently, that wasn't the first time she did something like that. FML
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Today, I finally had it with the redneck bully who's been tormenting me. He was repeatedly poking and pinching me and laughing out loud during class, so I slung him to the ground, pinning him. I got suspended. They only called his parents, who never do anything; my "caring" parents are looking into teen boot camp. FML
Today, my son, who to my great shame is a typical bully, was suspended for bullying a disabled girl. Her father must have been the biggest, meanest, most tattooed ex-marine I've ever seen. He blamed me for bad parenting, and I actually peed myself a little in fear, which he saw too. FML
Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, a woman accused me of bullying her son, and said that she is going to get me fired. Her son is a 27-year-old teacher at my school, whom I disciplined for showing up drunk. FML
Today, I got my ass beat by some kid in my grade. The reason I was targeted? The superintendent, aka my idiot father, suspended him for defending himself in another fight. The kid told me it's not personal, he needed to prove a point that our school doesn't do shit about bullying, As much as I agree with him… FML
Today, I gave a presentation about how teachers don't intervene enough when students are being bullied. Afterwards, I was practically bullied by my teacher for "not choosing a serious topic." FML
Today, I just got done being yelled at by my son's headteacher and a bunch of parents, all because my 6 year-old son has been arranging kiss dates between his classmates in exchange for sweets and so on. My little pimp in training. Not a proud dad moment. FML
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Top comments
Buttsexpirate 9
Like a motherfuckin boss!
sp4ksu_fml 4
well maybe the teacher should lighten up a bit and stop crampin styles...
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Comments (299)
modernjesus 0
Idk who's the idiot. It's obvious that you have to sensor what you say at school, so why would you say your opinion like that. He could have been a lot more subtle.
yellowzinnias 20
Um, it's called debate. Yes, they make you argue a side you may not necessarily agree with so that you can learn to argue EFFECTIVELY. Look to me like YOU'RE the idiot here for believing that you son should be allowed to curse at a teacher.
Sadfacesenior 5
That kid has style haha
Emilyinroom483 7
FYL for that, but you have the comfort that your son is goddamn awesome. It would help to know what the debate was about, but I've been forced to debate issues of personal contention in school against my own beliefs and it was extremely upsetting.
j0shimself 0
**** yea!
Mariamx24 1
Can I marry him? This kids beast.
Cloudberry 10
Seems both mom and son need a reality check. Cursing out a superior, in this case the teacher, is not the move of a "badass". It's the move of an idiot who doesn't realize where he stands in life. I bet we'll be seeing, "Today, I got bitched out by my son's manager. He told my son to take out the trash and my son said, 'Go f*ck yourself.' He got fired. FML" a few years from now.
The__Redneck 7
"Take out the trash" and "Repeat my political views" are two different things. If you don't understand that, perhaps you should start by googling "U.S. Constitution."
suxs4ulol 22
bad parenting? make him do chores for the time of his supension!
Lukaroast 0
your kid is a BAMF.
TaurusTheBull 13
Freedom of speech, baby! :D