Trust

Today, I had to call a plumber out, because my idiot daughter clogged the pipes while trying to flush a hamburger down the toilet. FML

Today, whilst vacuuming, I stupidly decided to vacuum the bathroom drain to see what would happen. Turns out it will cause stinking septic water to get sucked into the machine and spew all over the walls, ceiling and vanity. It also causes the vacuum cleaner to stop working. FML

Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML

Nice mental image

Today, I had no choice but to unclog a toilet with my bare hands. FML

Not all heroes…

Today, at work, the only toilet in the building was so clogged that it was overflowing. We didn't have a plunger, so basically the only way to stop it was to try and reach in and remove the blockage. I was nominated to do it. FML

Today, I unclogged a toilet. With my hand. For the second time this week. FML

Happy anniversary

Today, I volunteered to babysit my nephew. He somehow managed to lock himself in the bathroom and then flood it with the sink. I had to call his parents, and they're now on their way home from their romantic anniversary dinner. I'm not even getting paid for this. FML

Today, I learned that my housemate used a dry vacuum to unclog the toilet before moving out and then didn't change the vacuum bag. He left several weeks ago. FML

Give me strength

Today, I wanted to clean my house. Of course the vacuum cleaner got stuck behind furniture multiple times. After the fifth time or so, I gave it a good pull. Now my vacuum cleaner is broken and the socket is off the wall. FML

Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML