Today, while on the job as a cop, I was breaking up a loud house party. We were just doing one final check of the house, we walked into the bathroom to find a kid furiously wanking in the bath. This isn't the first time I've seen something like this. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I caught my coworker masturbating in the bathroom. This was during her shift, while I was mopping the bathroom floors. FML
Today, at college, I walked in on some kid jerking off in front of the bathroom sink. This place never ceases to amaze and disgust me. FML
Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML
Today, I walked in on my brother masturbating. In the living room. For the second time. FML
Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML
Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML
Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
hardcorepunk87 18
"Put your hands where we can see them!! Wait! No! Put them back! Put them back!"
rainbowsRlove 15
sir put the weapon down
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (55)
demix_fml 32
Aw op that bites .
Ludale06 3
actually it yanks
saffy66 34
Probably just as upsetting for him. I hope the mental image can be banished quickly OP.
revolvearoundme 15
You busted his nut.
Silk_Routes 14
Load Unload..weapon checked
Lalala579121 28
You better have been careful, that dude had a loaded gun.
bettyc4 26
Part of why I'd never choose a cop career. Can NOT handle crazy shiet.
KatieJBabe 27
Australia.. beautiful place, just don't attend any house parties.
aeryn97 17
I've heard some good ones. this is right up there with them. I can only imagine his post on here. ..something like "some asshats slipped me a viagra so I went to the loo to wank when the police burst through the door. fml"
dawood_k 27
Did he cum peacefully
cheshireau 26
I do not envy the jobs police have to do. Damn.