Today, everyone commented on how realistic my "fat suit" was. I didn't dress up for Halloween. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Halloween is cancelled
Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed as a pirate. Someone complimented me on how convincing the fake teeth were that I had on for my costume. I wasn't wearing fake teeth. FML
Today, it was Halloween, and I was giving candy to kids. When a group of kids who looked like they were around 4 years old came up to me and said, "Hey mister, do you have one of those things that make it look like you are fat under your shirt?" I didn't have one of those, but I lied and said, "Yes." FML
Today, even though I'm overweight, I was feeling alright about the way I looked in the historical costume I'm required to wear by my job. A little kid came in and asked me if I was having a baby. Guess I don't look as good as I thought. FML
Today, it was the first dress rehearsal at a community theater. I'm playing a grandma to a bunch of little kids, and the guy who is playing the grandpa wears a fat suit. I put on my costume and one of the kids comes up to me and says, "Are you wearing a fat suit too?" and pokes my stomach. FML
Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML
Today, it's Halloween. I get bullied every day and this was no exception, but this time I got beat up so hard I bled. Everyone thought it was part of my costume. FML
Today, I tried to boycott an 80's theme party by wearing my regular clothes. Everyone said they loved my costume. FML
Halloween freakout
Today, I went to my friend's costume party dressed as Michael Myers. My costume must've been too conspicuous because it drew violent attention. I'm still sore from the pushing, tackling, tripping, falling and body shots. FML
Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML
Today, I dressed up as my friend for Halloween. He has a very distinct style and I thought my costume was pretty clever. When he saw me, he said he had never been so offended in his entire life, and now I feel like a complete asshole. FML
Top comments
hotdogcore 9
Honestly this sounds kind of like a fake fml. Unless you haven't seen anyone you know in a really long time, or you decided spandex was back in fashion, I think people would have noticed you not being skinny long before now. Unless people you know are just asshats and decided they wanted to make a fat joke.
JNaftel 0
maybe you should just sit this Halloween out, you've obviously had your fair share of candy.
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Comments (89)
strandy 2
Oh dear.
GlaoigharAirm 0
A uh, bit early there eh, sport? I mean Halloween IS TOMORROW! >_>
teozac 0
faaake! halloween is tomorrow ...
JGood09 0
that doesn't mean shit, i've been to 4 halloween parties just this week
roeallen 11
at least they dont usually think you fat
guckylynn 19
Its called college... where we celebrate the shit out of holidays. There have been halloween parties all week.
bigbadtim 7
OP could have been at work too, and the office could have dressed up on Friday.
Blink182ftw 0
OP lay off the cookies
tookietookie123 5
In high school on Friday we were wearing our costumes. Well atleast in SoCal
77taylah33 0
play a prank on them for Halloween and get them back. sorry op=(
Haterman123 0
he/she is pronably in school and had a halloween party. (OP is probably like 10)
weightnc 1
Or maybe OP is just full of shit (pun intended)
luvtheknot 6
Hahahaha sorry but op but that was funny
TheFlyingLampie 4
Make then think you having a baby
hotdogcore 9
Unless this is the movie Junior with Danny DeVito and the Governator, or they are a Female to Male transsexual, I don't think it's possible for a MAN to have a baby.
Lizza330 28
I saw a thing on tv where the doctor said that it was possible for men to have kids. they just need to find a way to make the placenta stay unattached to internal organs.
TheFlyingLampie 4
If you believed that then you'll believe anything lmao
Lizza330 28
It was on Discovery Health; I don't think they'll make random things up on that channel. And if girls can have ectopic pregnancies I think guys can too.
lindsaysue 4
Dear lord.. Unless a man has a fully functioning ovary, there is no way for a sperm inside a male body to produce a fetus..
elmorous 0
can a hermaphrodite impregnate him/her (it) self?
lindsaysue 4
I doubt it. I want to say I learned that at least 1 of a hermaphrodite's reproductive organs are not working. But I probably just saw that on discovery health..
Lizza330 28
I didn't say he had to make the baby. I ment he would have to go to the doctors and have a fertalized egg put in him. Like ladies do when they can't concieve.
tencentsakiss 19
An ectopic pregnancy wouldn't be possible without a fallopian tube, so how would a man be able to have one? Also, I could be wrong, but doesn't an ectopic pregnancy kill both the women and the fetus without surgery? I'm actually really curious, none of that makes sense to me.
Lizza330 28
It's deadly because the placenta attaches to internal organs (if it's outside the womb) or could pop the fillopean tube (if it starts to grow inside the tube). But some babies survive.
Hystical 0
hermaphrodites can't make babys with themselves. I'm not sure of the reasoning behind it, but I'm learning things about this in school atm.
tencentsakiss 19
Oh ok, I actually thought an ectopic pregnancy could only be in the fallopian tube, that makes more sense now.
MzKitty83 0
I am an RN and for the most part ectopic pregnancies happen outside the uterus or inside the tubes u can have an egg fertilize in am ovary as well. tubal means strictly Fallopian tubes. and no man or male to female transexual can carry a baby they do not give them a uterus or ovaries, they simply take out penile tissue and use the skin to fashion a make shift ******. it's quite gruesome to see.
JNaftel 0
maybe you should just sit this Halloween out, you've obviously had your fair share of candy.
grabblebyk 1
HAHA that is gold!
moses92 0
hahah
hotdogcore 9
Honestly this sounds kind of like a fake fml. Unless you haven't seen anyone you know in a really long time, or you decided spandex was back in fashion, I think people would have noticed you not being skinny long before now. Unless people you know are just asshats and decided they wanted to make a fat joke.
Lizza330 28
That's what I was thinking.
cesciscecsy 0
same here :/
at1325 0
they didn't mention if these people where people they knew or strangers though
Rainbow35 6
6: Maybe OP usually wears baggy clothes, and then didn't at the party? :/
MRVOlivia 22
Maybe op was at a place where no one knew him.
C0leTRain01 5
I thought the same thing.
scooter69 0
sucks for you op!
JessAmmyy_ 0
its not hallaween yeet?
Mesocoollike 8
No, its tomorrow.
sweetcheeksjvl 0
That doesn't mean a thing college parties all the time.As long as Halloween parties fall within a week of the actual day it's considered a Halloween party.
Spac3Ghost 0
Hahahahahaha :) life :)
mcsquanch 0
Start gettin off of Jim and start goin!
bigbadtim 7
Huh?