Today, while I was in the break room at work, one of my coworkers walked in on me playing with my animal crackers, complete with animal noises. Now, the entire department won't stop teasing me and calling me Tarzan. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was pretending a long corridor at work was a catwalk, when a coworker walked out just in time to see me prancing around like an idiot. Now the whole building is laughing about it. FML
Today, while working at a nursing home, I was alone in the station and figured I could sneak one out. It wound up being very loud, and I could hear the faint snickering of a patient in the next room. Every time he saw me for the rest of the day he would burst out laughing. FML
Today, my co-worker and I played a game where we give each other the bird in whatever creative manner we could come up with. Deciding to be sneaky, I hid behind a wall with my middle finger up as I heard him walking into the office. It was my boss. FML
Today, one of my super obnoxious coworkers tried to snitch on me and record me for “being lazy” on the clock. I was sitting in my car, while eating trail mix ON MY BREAK. FML
Today, I was stuck with a coworker all morning while she had the "front farts." I moved to a different area after lunch, only to have another coworker start talking loudly about her boyfriend's skin tags, and how he likes to have her bite them off. I'm so disgusted but afraid to report it. FML
Today, the girl I like at work surprised me in the otherwise empty break room. She caught me taking part in what might as well have been the Ball-Scratching Olympics. I didn't notice she was behind me until she cleared her throat to get my attention. Shit. FML
Today, at work my boss called me into his office because he had received multiple complaints from coworkers about a prank sound machine I have been using to make inappropriate fart sounds at my desk. I wish it was a fart machine; I have a condition. FML
Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML
Today, the only cute girl in my office made fun of me because I'm 27 and bring fruit cups with my lunch. FML
Today, I was at work with my boyfriend. I was being playful and recounting something that had happened in my D&D session the night before. I imitated the roar from the dragon that the DM had done, and midway though, the postman walked in with a delivery. He walked back out without a word. FML
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Top comments
crchara 3
what else are animal crackers supposed to be used for?
ClassyCommando 13
Years ago, I was adrift at sea, all I had were my beloved animal crackers. I... had to eat them to survive. Every last one. The memories still haunt me. So I drink to dull my anguish.
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Comments (170)
crchara 3
what else are animal crackers supposed to be used for?
muzy 23
They also make excellent companions. Don't ask me how i know though ...
iDaniel525 8
How do you know?
crchara 3
oh I believe so
suxs4ulol 22
watch out, we have a bad ass over here!
ClassyCommando 13
Years ago, I was adrift at sea, all I had were my beloved animal crackers. I... had to eat them to survive. Every last one. The memories still haunt me. So I drink to dull my anguish.
muzy 23
All I'm saying is that it involved two animal crackers being placed in a position that may or may not have been misunderstood.... DON'T JUDGE ME !!!
soccerguy2 11
Don't worry ClassyCommando I'm sure they will understand. better for one to live than none.
ClassyCommando 13
Thank you for the inspirational words. I'm joining AA tomorrow. I'm gonna make them crackas proud. *Please do not interpret that as a racial slur*
Jiplo 18
I BELIEVE IN YOU CLASSYCOMMANDO!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
sovetskiy 8
I'd say F your coworkers' lives for having no sense of humour.
Averyoto 2
They do have a sense of humor for calling him Tarzan
FMLsuckscock 0
FML sucks ****
blackstar994 5
It'd be pretty sad if classy was serious...
taytay6510 6
Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?!
ClassyCommando 13
refer to comment 8
Chad_the_Brony 0
To avoid the situation of current, you should have invited him to join you. The reason he told everyone, if that is how the mocking started, was because he was upset you didn't share. Sharing is caring. Remember to smile.jpg.
kitkatknicknack 12
Playing with food is always a good time
upyourzlolz 11
My blow-up dolls were named: Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday And Saturday.
upyourzlolz 11
Actually, 5/7 of them were Asian. By the way, you wouldn't happen to be mrmisfit, would you?
TheMaster15 10
Animal crackers in my soup, monkeys and rabbits loop the loop!
DFlit1 0
No don't drowned them!!! Unless u get the sea aminal crackers like with wales and dolphins :D
nnguyen1995 0
Aminals? Is that a new species? :O
xiaoxaio 5
when you stop the gorilla revolution they'll be thanking you tarzan
Dr_Jalepenos 0
"Today, while I was in the break room at work, one of my coworkers walked in on me........" -_- tell me u guys didnt expect something else...*coughfapcough*
Dr_Jalepenos 0
Lol i shoudve added the "playing with me" part too
Moviegirl89 11
Dude why?
shellz102 12
Forever alone...
suxs4ulol 22
Because he's cool.
bball234 6
refer to #1.
robertlovespi 3
"A dude is a guy that works on a ranch!" - a pissed off officer.
tkay98 0
Food is here so we can play with it, not eat it.
BeaterOfTheDrums 15
Embrace it op. EBRACE IT! AhhhhhAhhhAhhAhhha!! Sorry, that personality keeps escaping from it's cage.
upyourzlolz 11
Here. I'll kill it for you.
suxs4ulol 22
no!
blackstar994 5
Get it a bigger nicer cage.
deathbreadstick 10
*its
ICATiger 13
112- Get it's a nice biger cage??? That does'nt make ang sense!!!
jroxursox1 10
Or play with the animal crackers and then act like godzilla mercilessly devouring them (:
suxs4ulol 22
om nom nom
iDaniel525 8
Tarzan no like being made fun of.
MrLookAtThere 10
Indeed, when did Tarzan stop being a manly man, and king of the jungle? When did he turn into a weird ****-tard who plays with imaginary animal friends, who also happen to be biscuits..
BeaterOfTheDrums 15
I think they are a type of cookie. But I'm also legally retarded...
rachaelheartsNY 8
I'm pretty sure they are *crackers* but who knows.
BeaterOfTheDrums 15
Okay I looked it up. They are animal shaped piece of *sweetened cookie-like* dough. Sweet=cookie. Salty=cracker. They can be both.
blackstar994 5
22- where the **** did you get biscuit from? It's a cracker dumb ass. Animal "CRACKER".
NYC_Yoshi 3
Good form, but real men wear speedos!
iDaniel525 8
NYC, are you talking about my picture?
ICATiger 13
You're the king of the jungle tarzan tell those bitchs who's boss!
thisisafunnyname 12
Random question: can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
horizontalline 18
Yes.
zombicidal 11
vegans cannot however
ClassyCommando 13
Yes, 8, and vice versa :)
alphaskater09 9
Random question: can animal crackers eat vegetarians?
ClassyCommando 13
refer to comment 45.
DFlit1 0
^They probably want to but sadly their mouths r just to small
xSonic 9
I'm sorry for being stupid, but what's the difference between a Vegan and a Vegetarian? (I'm too lazy to google)
tylersign 11
110- There are different types of vegetarians.. But mainly we exclude meat, eggs, dairy, etc out of our diets- with some exceptions. Vegans, however, don't eat anything that comes from an animal. At all. Bye.
xSonic 9
Aight peace.
zoe768532 1
Why were you even doing that?
Wolveslikepie 4
Why were you not???
Monkeybuttcream 4
Why dont you just make them have animal sex like a normal person?
blackstar994 5
From the look of 9s picture, he doesn't wast time to play with them. xD
theunwiseone 4
Would you prefer to be called Jane?
nickdunbar 8
Thats what i do all the time!