Today, while driving my car near a farm, I hit a man on the side of the road. I started freaking out and got out of the car to help him. It was then that I found out that I'd hit a scarecrow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after I got in my car in the Walmart parking lot, a creepy man knocked on my window. Since I'm incredibly paranoid and scare easily, I put my car in gear and tore out of there, accidentally hitting another car. Apparently he was returning my phone that I dropped. FML
Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML
Today, I saw a bad car wreck. I pulled over and ran to the car to find an unconscious man behind the wheel. Another car pulled up, and a guy got out. I was relieved to have help, until, to my horror, he started trying to hit on me. I was stuck with him until the ambulance arrived. FML
Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML
Today, I was driving around my campsite at dark in the middle of a forest. My father thought it would be funny to run up to my window, put his face against the glass and scream. I drove into a tree. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and saw a man trip over a sign. He then grabbed his cane, started screaming, and began beating the sign. Apparently that didn't release his anger, so he began to beat the nearest car. I thought it was hilarious, until I noticed it was my car. FML
Today, I was at my friend's house. It was dark and downpouring so I couldn't see as I was backing out of his driveway. I made it out, but then my phone went off, scaring me, and I accidentally hit the gas pedal, hitting his neighbor's parked car. Turns out he called to warn me to watch out for it. FML
Today, I swerved off the road and hit a tree in order to avoid hitting a dog that came out of nowhere. Don't worry, I didn't hit him. The person behind me did, though. FML
Today, I was driving my new car home when I came around a sharp turn to see a groundhog in the road. I kindly stopped and allowed it to cross when all of the sudden a car slammed into the back of mine. Then, another car went flying around us. That car hit and killed the groundhog. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
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Top comments
jumpshot32 11
Use your brain next time! You're fortunate enough to have one, unlike Mr. Scarecrow
ninjadinos 14
Hey hey hey, scarecrows are important too! Didn't you learn anything from The Wizard of Oz? He may not have a brain but he has feelings, you know. :|
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Comments (85)
march_17 0
Were you driving with you're eyes closed??
gracehi 33
Were you typing with *your eyes closed?
Michael_92 20
That's the first time I have seen it "you're" instead of "your" I guess there is a first time for everything after all.
Sylvasa 15
You could have hit a person though!! Watch what you do while driving
gracehi 33
YOU KILLED A SCARECROW???? YOU MONSTER!!!!
DracoSpirita 21
^ Epic.
luckyd880 12
Cue wizard of oz jokes...
LSS_fml 18
How did you hit something on the side of the road? Texting? Perving elsewhere? Reading a map? Good one....
br0ccoli 15
No, OP. That wasn't a scarecrow! That was a severely emaciated anorexic out for a 7 hour jog. You should be ashamed of yourself! Disclaimer: if you're anorexic, get help. ED's are no joke.
pieceoschmidt 8
Hilarious and yes (at the risk of sounding mundane) you're lucky it wasn't a person, but what were you doing on the side of the road? I live in an area surrounded by farms and no scarecrow I've ever seen has ever been close enough to the road to actually hit without careening through fences and tearing through a field of corn or whatnot. Watch the road why don't you? O__o
pookberry 4
Do NOT read FML while driving. Lesson learned.
bubbywaldo 0
This is not an FML!! This is a "Oh my god I am so lucky and I will be so much more careful from now on!"