Today, while at the mall, a kid no older than 5 pushed a stroller into my heel, which caught the back of my shoe and caused me to face-plant the floor in the middle of a very crowded department store. I didn't even get an apology. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tripped over a kid at work. She was sitting on the floor with her legs sticking out into the walkway. Her mom caused a scene, accusing me of doing it on purpose. FML
Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML
Today, I walked into a glass door at a busy mall. Not only did I face-plant in front of a crowd, but I also left an almost perfect imprint of my face on the glass. FML
Today, as I was trying to get off a crowded train, some asshole pushed past me hard enough to nearly knock me over. My bag hit a preschool kid standing behind me, and I missed my stop trying to apologize to him. His mom yelled at me all the way to the next stop. FML
Today, I slipped on a wet floor in the grocery store. Instead of falling gracefully or quickly, I windmilled my arms for a few seconds while making direct eye contact with a toddler who looked genuinely impressed. I didn’t fall, but still… FML
Today, I embarrassed myself by screaming for help in a crowded mall when my shoelace got stuck at the top of the escalator. Someone behind me kicked the shoelace and it came out easily. FML
Today, I accidentally slipped on a wet floor at my local mall after copious amounts of snow. There was no sign. I accidentally hit a lady trying to help me when falling backwards and gave her a bloody nose. I am now banned from the mall for two weeks and told I was lucky she didn’t press charges. FML
Today, I slipped on a small wet patch of floor in the grocery store and fell flat on my back, bringing my half-full shopping cart down with me. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
He probably meant no harm. Just tell him Santa doesn't exist and run away.
DocBastard 40
As the parent of a five-year old, I can tell you that most of them don't know right from wrong. It sounds like a simple accident (we let our daughter push her brother sometimes, but only under strict supervision), so blaming the child here or expecting an apology is just wrong. Blaming the parents, however is justified. And by "blaming" I mean cursing them out for not watching their kid, and coincidentally teaching the kid some colourful new 4-letter words that they'll be repeating for months.
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Comments (45)
mzkay7 1
Not saying my son is perfect but he is three and if he did that he would apologiZe. But if I had my son pushing a stroller he would be supervised...parents these days are lazy .
GirlOnFire143 6
He was only 5, give him a break.
dogpup4 23
Pretty sure a five year old knows how to say sorry. Kids get let off too lightly these days.
burritosrgood 12
*downvote*
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Why is everyone saying to give the kid a break? Five-year-olds are more than old enough to know when to apologize, and this was definitely an apologetic situation. Everyone saying to give him a break is the reason kids these days get away with everything - no one disciplines kids anymore and just condones whatever they do, and hand things to them on silver platters. It makes me sick. OP should have at least found the parents and told them to watch their kid and teach him basic manners. He's past old enough to know better.
burritosrgood 12
Ike?
egc573 40
27: I know that any mother can be presumptuous, but I find it is particularly prevalent in America because of the whole sex offender scare thing. There's a reason that men in this country (even some fathers) stay clear of little boys and girls lest they get accused of being perverts, EVEN when they're trying to help! I have yet to see such hesitation in other places.
krewer21 1
Parents apologize for the actions of their offspring? Maybe 3 generations ago, mom was probably too busy getting new ink or something else pierced to care...
KiddNYC1O 22
What about dad, man???
krewer21 1
Dad, you think he's really in the picture? I doubt the sperm provider is even in state... Yeah, I'm bitter
SqueakyChipmunk 22
In a bar across the street. I swear, parents just leave their kids and expect everything to be ok. I would have handcuffed him to something and waited for his mother to come back.
isamisis 9
Next time, 'accidentally fall' & take the kid down with you. The little bastardos are so inconsiderate.
yourmurderscenex 13
my almost four year old knows whats right from wrong and his manners. so people who are saying "he is just a kid he doesnt know better" i call bs. my son will accidently run into someone and the first thing he will say is "excuse me" or "im so sorry". another thing is you should let a small child push a stroller, they cant see where they are going. the only time i let my son push the stroller is if he is helping me. yeah, i may look like an over sized duck but atleast i dont have people being knocked over around me.
DocBastard 40
My 5-year old has excellent manners, but that's the exception these days, not the rule. You can't assume every parent is a good one. Quite the opposite, in fact.
downtime 13
56, You can't assume every parent is a good one, but you should expect them to be.
writergirl23 19
He was only five ...
burritosrgood 12
He was only a human being with a fully working complex brain...
tehdarkness 21
I would have told the child that when something like that happens they should apologize. Obviously the parents aren't teaching it, maybe you should. Then go on to tell it about hell and how it's bound to end up there if it continues on like this.