Today, while at the dog park, I suddenly had to use the bathroom really badly. Since there weren't any facilities nearby, I decided to go behind a tree and relieve myself there. While doing this, two other owners, one who's in my math class, noticed me, despite me trying to hide. She definitely saw everything. School will be fun tomorrow. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I needed to take a dump at school. As soon as I sat down, somebody else walked in. I'm extremely poop-shy, so I was forced to wait for several minutes while they styled their hair and applied makeup. After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then someone else walked in. FML
Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML
Today, I was shopping in a mall when I needed to go to the bathroom. One of the toilets was out of order, so I went to the other toilet. After that, there was no toilet paper, so when I saw tissue in the sink, I left the stall with my pants down and someone saw me. FML
Today, our school got portable classrooms for the construction on our school. I had to take a dump really bad, and had to use the built in bathroom. As I was in there I heard laughing. Turns out, every sound you make is an entire broadcast to the class. FML
Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML
Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML
Today, I took a massive dump at work and clogged the industrial toilet. Since I used the unisex one at the end of the hall, I watched my super hot coworker walk in after me. And then she ran out immediately. Everyone had seen me walk out before her. FML
Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML
Today, I was worried about passing an exam, so I hid a note under my skirt. When the guy next to me was finished, I had to get up so he could leave. With no time to hide the note, I stood in front of the entire class, hand over my crotch, looking as if I had to pee. FML
Today, as I was getting ready to go to class, I accidentally stepped in dog poop. I was in a hurry, so I scraped it off as best as I could. When I go to class, I noticed it smelled. The girl behind me noticed and said, "Mmmmm, smells like food in here." FML
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Top comments
skyeyez9 25
My female friend was in the army on a field training exercise. She had to poop so found a private spot. Just as she was in the middle of #2, a group of Rangers filed past.
youngbutwise15 5
Yes, it centainly wil be, buddy.
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Comments (129)
babyboo1592 0
y would u take a dump by a tree? r u like retarded or something!
iloveloosy12 0
lol who cares if you're a dude? if you were a girl it would be different, but for guys it's all good
F_ur_life_douche 0
look at the bright side, if u hAve a large dick mabye she was turned on by it and she might hook up with u
heypeoplezzz 0
yeah. someone i knew was doing that and his head teacher same and saw him. everyone was talking about it. at least your head teacher didnt see you. anyway, theyll probley just forget ;) (unless theyre bullies :|)
Big_Al120 0
i was on probation in high school and had a female PO so my principals and disciplinarians would have to watch me give my urine samples
Igor_g5 0
Probably everybody at school is gonna be laughing cuz she's gonna tell how small it was.
blastvortex 4
You really put yourself into a piss-tastic situation, OP. YDI for doing something both foolish and illegal. Be thankful that you weren't arrested.
Kirlyfoo 9
am I the only one who noticed he sounds a bit like a chick in dis
strawberryswirl 0
I hate guys who piss outside. It's disgusting. Hold it in. We girls certainly manage to, and also not to spit everywhere, belch annoyingly loudly, and scratch ourselves.
tpauley19 0
if you have a big **** it shouldn't matter
kombucha_fml 8
you deserve it for pissing outside. it's not like you're an animal or something.