Today, we took the kids to the local pond near my sister-in-law's to feed the geese. I hadn't been there before, and thought I'd take a picture. I turned around to adjust my camera, but the geese, realizing the feast had ended, took flight. Before I could react I was showered with goose shit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was reading on a park bench not far from a grassy spot and a pond. A flock of geese landed on the grassy patch and began to eat some grass. I thought that I may be bothering the geese, but decided if I left them alone, they'd leave me alone as well. I was wrong. Geese are assholes. FML
Today, I went for a "relaxing" walk on a local trail. I got chased by an angry goose halfway back to my car. Apparently, it didn’t appreciate my "peaceful" attempt to take a selfie with it. FML
Today, I was at a pond taking pictures with my new camera. I saw a mama duck leading her babies around and decided to get in closer to take a picture. Mama duck got spooked and led her babies too close to a waterfall escaping. One fell off. It never surfaced. FML
Today, I tried to take a picture next to a peacock, but ended up running away with a face and mouth full of feathers. FML
Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML
Today, I tried to take a cute selfie with a majestic swan by a lake. Just as I was about to take the pic, the swan suddenly got visibly bored of my shit and chased me into the water. I emerged from the lake looking like a soggy, defeated swamp beast. FML
Today, while on a run, I thought I'd run into a flock of geese in a field. Doing so, I learned that when you do this alone, the birds don't fly away, they attack. FML
Today, in order to try and get over my slight fear of swans, I went down to the local park to feed them. One decided that I looked tastier than the bread I was throwing and chased me around the feeding area while everybody laughed. FML
Today, while at the beach, my little sister thought it would be cute to feed a small seagull some of her food. Minutes later a flock of seagulls swarmed and attacked me and my sandwich. FML
Today, while driving, I put on my hazards and slowed to a stop to let a family of geese cross the street. The pick-up truck behind me however, decided to change lanes and speed off, running over at least half of them. FML
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Top comments
Dubstep_fml 1
this fml is full of shit.
jw90 18
why do birds always seem to shit on human beings? someday we should just shit on them back and see how they like it. yea...that'll show em to poop on me.
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Comments (35)
FerrariCake 2
That's what happens when you feed the geese... they shit. It's like the circle of life. (edit: damn, i just noticed #6 beat me to that one...)
GeeseCrap 0
Geese do *NOT* crap while in flight (unless they're migrating a long distance).
Person1233 13
Psshh the geese where I live crap 24/7 -.- In flight, out of flight, on cars, fly into classroom windows and shit on desks...
sLAUGHTERxx 0
GeeseCrap: I have to agree with you. Geese do not crap whilst in flight. They either crap 'n go, or take flight, land, crap, and THEN go. But I'm almost sure that geese do not crap while they are flying. If I am wrong please don't rag on me. There aren't many geese where I live, but the only geese I've seen have NOT crapped during flight. I'm thinking this is a fake...but I'm not sure. You definately don't deserve it if it isn't a fake, but your life isn't F'd because of it. Go do your laundry. Not that hard. Because I believe this is fake, YOU DESERVE IT!
ml_really 0
This was my first post. I'm new to the site and didn't expect this kind of response. Anyway, I guess I should have been more precise. I have to agree that it probably wasn't a goose that shit on me. The only goose shit I've ever seen looks like greenish white cat turds-- this wasn't like that. It must have been one of the mallards or this other white-headed fowl (duck ?) that we don't have in NY. If I saw the offender I would have moved, but I was definitely shat upon.
jw90 18
why do birds always seem to shit on human beings? someday we should just shit on them back and see how they like it. yea...that'll show em to poop on me.
topshoprincess 0
Lmao, did you go to Glen Hilton Park? (for people that don't know, it's located in NC) 'Cause the geese and ducks there are bat shitty lol I had a friend who got attack by one of them before
Mmbop 0
I dont see why geese wouldnt be able to fly and poop at the same time. It doesnt seem like that hard of an ability haha.
CallMeHush 1
Geese don't shit while they fly, and they usually swim away looking for the next person to mooch from after theyhave been fed. My camera can be hard to adjust sometimes, taking a whole 30 seconds, why would you wait till the food is all gone to finally take a picture?
Cristaderzi 0
Its actually gokd luck! No Joke!!!
Puhlmann 0
Why would you turn around to ajust your camera? Wouldn't you be looking at the geese to ajust it to your liking?
ml_really 0
I had already taken a bunch of pictures and I thought I'd try the "Best Shot" mode (I"ve had the camera awhile but never used this feature). When I held the camera down to scroll through the samples there was a lot of glare on the screen so I just turned around. Didn't put much thought into it.
Ninjaface 0
Don't geese usually chase/attack you if you have food? That's what happens to me. They're like freaking zombies, except louder.