Today, on Thanksgiving, I asked my kid what she is thankful for. "My tablet." I had just told her I was thankful for her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I let my 5 year old play on my tablet while we were both using one of those family restrooms with two toilets. She took a selfie showing both on us on the toilet and sent it to my husband. FML.
Today, I was shopping when I overheard a woman telling an employee that she was buying an iPad for her 5-year-old son. Annoyed, I turned around and ranted about how he should have more age appropriate toys. Then she explained that her son is autistic and will be using the iPad to communicate. FML
Today, my 3 year old kid wanted to do something nice. I told him he could pick up some of his toys. He washed my new Iphone instead. FML
Today, while trying to get my picky daughter to eat her dinner, I pretended to take some of her food and give it to her brother, thinking that would get her to eat it. Instead, she thanked me. FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Today, I’m going to have two Thanksgivings. One at my parents' for the first half of the day, then the other at my house. I let my boyfriend know beforehand about it, as well as my sister. She then told my mom about my plan and next thing I know, I got a phone call from mom that turned into her yelling at me for not staying all day. FML
Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML
Today, while mopping the kitchen, I ended up slipping and and knocked over the table that had my mom’s iPad on it. The screen shattered; I sprained my wrist. I asked my mom to take me to the ER. She called me "selfish" because her iPad screen repair would "cost more." FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with my kids. I told my 13 year old about how the very first time she said she loved me. She was 2 and it was at this very restaurant. I told her the details and even started tearing up a little. She didn't even look up from her cell phone and said, "That's fab, ma." FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML
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Top comments
Enslaved 38
I'm thankful for parents that don't ask me trick questions just to feed their ego.
RichardPencil 32
You should be thankful that your child recognizes blatant compliment-fishing when she sees it.
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Comments (34)
rockydify 22
You definitely deserve it for expecting your child to say something profound and heartfelt. Sheesh.
netflixjunkie8 8
I'm sorry. ? She is thankful for you though. I was shocked that mine said she was thankful for me. She's been going through some not nice phases.
cheshireau 26
Kids say the darnedest things.
4everBroken 13
Being a parent is a thankless job and sometimes it takes kids a bit longer to realize what's important, maybe she would already know if she wasn't probably too spoiled. My mom made me pay for everything with money I earned myself. (Besides gifts) but my mom always took them if she didn't think I was ready to have them. Either because I was too young and would get too absorbed into games/ being online or would hurt myself. I didn't even have a phone until my last year of middle school and my school was full of poor kids who always had the best phones/ iPods or whatever.... I was only allowed a flip with no camera and I paid for minutes so it wasn't unlimited and I didn't have free rein and just being able to call/ text whoever whenever. And I'm glad she raised me this way. Kids my age were buying weed in the hallways but me? I always saved up for minutes on my phone.
Crystal55621 19
Your mom is a bit harsh. How could you pay for everything as a child? I'm assuming you didn't get a job at the age of 5.
omeeka 4
My son is 6 and he said he was thankful for video games. I know he loves me, I don't need him to declare it in front of others. No one even asked me what I was thankful for (I probably would have said video games too, keeps the kid outta my hair!)
dyllan1000 10
Just don't step on it (reference to other FML)
Cipsi82 7
Kids will say the damnedest things and dont take it personal if we could see it through their eyes we'd probably see nothing wrong cause kids can put words into play that most adults wouldn't but kids see things differently like we all used to but we knew where those things came from
The_Logical_One 2
She's just a kid
robertgamerguy 6
At least she's thankful for her expensive electronics. I know plenty of kids whom act like their 500$ tablets are frisbees
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Yeah, kids' priorities these days are messed up. Perhaps it's time to take the tablet away?