Today, my wife made a system where I earn gaming time by either giving her money or doing her favors. Now whenever I use my phone, she accuses me of "secretly playing Xbox games" and gets pissed at me. I'm 28 years-old. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Irony level: High
Today, my wife refuses to let me play my Xbox, except at the weekends, because it’s "a childish waste of time" and "we need to spend more time together", yet when we’re together she has no problem spending hours on games on her phone. No, she does not see the irony in this either. FML
Mixed messages
Today, I learned that my wife lets our son play video games while I'm at work to "keep him out of her hair." We had agreed that he was forbidden from gaming until his grades came up, but apparently she can't be bothered to actually parent. FML
Modern bonding
Today, my wife is mad at me because she claims I don’t spend any time bonding with her son. It’s as though she refuses to understand that just because we are in different rooms, on separate PlayStations, doesn’t mean we’re not playing the same game, and talking through headphones for hours at a time. FML
Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML
Mind reader
Today, my wife bitched me out 3 times in a row, for things that were not even my fault: for turning my Xbox on, even though I only nudged the button accidentally with my toe; opening a beer when it was actually a Pepsi for our son, and walking loudly when I "know she has a headache," which I didn’t. FML
Today, I found out that my 43 year-old wife has been having a cyber relationship with a 14 year-old kid on Halo. FML
Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML
Time to bail
Today, my girlfriend likes playing games on her phone more than she likes me. FML
Gamers rise up
Today, my girlfriend destroyed my Xbox, because somewhere in her psycho brain she actually thought it would get me to pay more attention to her, even though I only play 3 hours on a Sunday. Joke's on her, I bought a new one, she’s back on the streets, and I play it a whole lot more now. FML
Shady dealings
Today, my wife says she's not hiding money from me but I checked our joint bank account, which I no longer use, and find she's been transferring money in-and-out of 3 accounts, while taking money from me and getting payday loans to cover it. FML
Top comments
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
Did she also make a sex rewards chart?
UberNova 18
**** her, she doesn't own you. Do what you want.
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Comments (162)
Alastor13X 8
Divorce is expensive, but you can't put a price on your happiness.
maxman217 7
she's your wife not your mother, you need to tell her that in very very clear terms, if she can't handle that fact, she needs to go.
liaRawr 9
She's not your mum lol
betterdaysahead 14
grow a pair of balls man really do you work and play bills if so make a shopping chart for her then
strawberrywine22 30
Daaaamn you guys have some psycho wives...my husband games as much as he wants, as long as I get one night a week for snuggles and movies.
LtBoom 13
Sounds like it's time to strap on some balls and take control of your life. Put your ******' foot down and remind her she ain't your mom, you're a grown ass man and can play games whenever you damn well please. Good luck on your journey to becoming un-whipped. its a tough one.
BriCx 8
If a guy did that to a girl, feminists would scream "Abuse Relationship!" Talk about a double standard.
JustinRanford99 3
Are you kidding me? **** that system OP. Do what you want. Im so dam sick of women controlling men these days and men letting it happen. Not enough men have the balls to stand up to their wives and tell them who`s in charge. OP tell ur wife ur not following that system, and if she does not like it, it`s her problem.
Dark_Stream 29
YDI. You are very lucky you still have a wife who's willing to keep working on your marriage. If you want to act like a game obsessed teenager, instead of a married adult, you can expect to get treated like one. You crossed a line. Suck it up, and try to get back in your wife's good graces. If you don't you're likely to end up back in your parent's basement.
cryssycakesx3 23
is this serious? he's a grown man, he can spend his free time however he wants. he can play with dolls if he damn well pleases. no. no lines were crossed. she's capitalizing on his hobby. I hate those "oh so hip gamers" as much as the next person but he can do what he wants. using his games to get money isn't "saving the marriage." quite the opposite actually. she's not telling him "you play too much, pay more attention to me and the house." she's actually not limiting his time at all so that's obviously not the problem, she's just using it for her gain. would it be fair if he says to her "you shop too much, but if you suck me off it's OK."?
luckyone365 7
Sounds like grounds for divorce. Life is too short to let some bitch treat you like you're her child. I presume that's why you moved out of your mother's house. So you can live by your own rules.