Today, my wife made a system where I earn gaming time by either giving her money or doing her favors. Now whenever I use my phone, she accuses me of "secretly playing Xbox games" and gets pissed at me. I'm 28 years-old. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife refuses to let me play my Xbox, except at the weekends, because it’s "a childish waste of time" and "we need to spend more time together", yet when we’re together she has no problem spending hours on games on her phone. No, she does not see the irony in this either. FML
Today, I learned that my wife lets our son play video games while I'm at work to "keep him out of her hair." We had agreed that he was forbidden from gaming until his grades came up, but apparently she can't be bothered to actually parent. FML
Today, my wife is mad at me because she claims I don’t spend any time bonding with her son. It’s as though she refuses to understand that just because we are in different rooms, on separate PlayStations, doesn’t mean we’re not playing the same game, and talking through headphones for hours at a time. FML
Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML
Today, my wife bitched me out 3 times in a row, for things that were not even my fault: for turning my Xbox on, even though I only nudged the button accidentally with my toe; opening a beer when it was actually a Pepsi for our son, and walking loudly when I "know she has a headache," which I didn’t. FML
Today, I found out that my 43 year-old wife has been having a cyber relationship with a 14 year-old kid on Halo. FML
Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML
Today, my girlfriend likes playing games on her phone more than she likes me. FML
Today, my girlfriend destroyed my Xbox, because somewhere in her psycho brain she actually thought it would get me to pay more attention to her, even though I only play 3 hours on a Sunday. Joke's on her, I bought a new one, she’s back on the streets, and I play it a whole lot more now. FML
Today, my wife says she's not hiding money from me but I checked our joint bank account, which I no longer use, and find she's been transferring money in-and-out of 3 accounts, while taking money from me and getting payday loans to cover it. FML
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Top comments
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
Did she also make a sex rewards chart?
UberNova 18
**** her, she doesn't own you. Do what you want.
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Comments (162)
rosetad200 6
A 28-year-old man should not be playing video games on his Xbox in the first place! Good for her! For treating you like a child that you are
FallenStar06 5
Seriously?? People of all ages play video games. I'm 28 and my husband is 31 and we like to play video games. It doesn't make us children, it's just something we like to do. My mother, who is in her 50s, plays on her Wii. My father, also in his 50s, likes to play games on his computer. It has nothing to do with your mentality; it's just something a lot of people like to do.
bigpops 12
grow some balls
tigilly 14
Damn OP, you're whipped like Willow Smith's hair.
mariab2898 13
That's kinda ridiculous. Her. Not you.
Sitting_Ducki 8
Ask her what you get when she wants stuff?
archos58 10
kindly but firmly point out that you are not her child, do not answer to her, and will allocate your time as you see fit.
austx 3
Grow a pair of balls, Man!!!
NavitasNexus 3
You married her!
LuluRichards 20
Well.. you are 28..and married...
angel80_fml 2
How old ARE you ? She's your wife...not your mommy ! Seems a bit strange she feels the need to control your gaming time. My 15 year old gets weekends only.