Today, my son had to help out at the local retirement home for his community service. He got in serious trouble and came whining to me about it after he tried threatening some of the residents into taking part in a Harlem Shake video. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML
Today, my son broke his arm roughhousing with his brother on a bunk bed. While at the ER, he thought it would be funny to tell a different story to each doctor and nurse, forcing me to speak over him. They found this behavior "suspicious" and reported us to child services. FML
Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML
Today, my son came running in, saying he had a project due tomorrow. I asked when it was assigned; he said two weeks ago. I refused to help, saying that he failed to act responsibly and had to live with the consequences. Now he's throwing a tantrum and my wife is screaming at me. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me filming a Harlem Shake video. He stared for a moment, then said, "Son, I don't have a problem with homosexuals, but… nevermind", shook his head and walked out. FML
Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML
Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML
Today, my son paid the price for emulating his idols, aka the sub-human scum on Jersey Shore. He called me from jail and actually had the balls to try to guilt me into bailing him out, after he'd been arrested for punching his girlfriend at a liquor store. FML
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML
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Top comments
OhDearBetrayal 25
He's a little late for that.
Silly_Lilly6969 23
The poor elderly. After they've lived so long they get harassed by a teenager to do a Harlem shake video.
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Comments (92)
OhDearBetrayal 25
He's a little late for that.
rawr_ily96 24
I could've sworn the Harlem Shakers died out.
182yellowgreen41 10
If that comes back I'm gonna shoot myself.
Faff 20
82, i think you might have some other issues if those videos upset you that much.
tjv3 10
Umm he sounds like a terrible person. Sounds like you either didn't teach him respect for elders? If you did then he is just a bad person who needs to learn respect
liv_graham 7
#88 he isn't a terrible person, just a teenage boy
Silly_Lilly6969 23
The poor elderly. After they've lived so long they get harassed by a teenager to do a Harlem shake video.
Puffytruffles 18
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Poor? They be trying to take over the world. No sympathy needed for them.
Damian95 16
You have to admit a lot of FMLs lately have been about old people doing and saying ridiculous things. But I wouldn't take it as far as to say they are taking over.
MissyMiss5 13
Umm they've lived their lives and have paid their dues so really it's their world we are just part of it! Look at Betty White for example finally getting old people to "fight" back! Go old people! :)
Faff 20
72, old people are still people, not angels.
bluehero 17
Old news
andyyroxx 20
(Perpetual)Inb4
crudeandrudeguy 29
Congratulations on raising the pathetic moron
Stefanie88 24
Unfortunately for him that fad has died out, thankfully.
asdfjkl123456 13
Good kid you got there. But the new thing is Hallway Swimming.. (Let's just save the elderly some trouble and not tell him, ok?)
rawr_ily96 24
But what if he looks at FML? HE KNOWS!!! >_>
B5B0N35 18
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
DO THE HARLEM SHAKE
B5B0N35 18
Ok :(
\ 28
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
HOW ABOUT I HARLEM SHAKE... MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS!
andyyroxx 20
How about no?
B5B0N35 18
#49 Wtf
\ 28
There was a meme that featured someone from Everybody Loves Raymond saying that...
abcdog123 16
OU OU WHO WANTS TO SEE GRANDPA DISLOCATE HIS HIPS DURING A PELVIC THRUST????? no one?... yeah i thought soo
EVnIAS 13
maybe :
EVnIAS 13
well him faking it not it actually happen
DocBastard 40
Your son is a delinquent and needs to have the shit beaten out of him. I nominate the old folks. Give them each a turn beating him with their canes and walkers, and we'll see if he ***** with them again.
Welshite 40
Hand over the cane, Doc... You shouldn't be beating up youngsters; you might give yourself a heart attack, you old bastard.
B5B0N35 18
This guy!
lilhellian 27
Reading cane and seeing a banana pic right below this led to thought that some of them might do more than just beat his ass with the cane...
this is my name22 10
You need to tell your kid to respect the elderly, and not force people to do died out Internet fads.