Today, my sister brought me coffee to my office. It was really nice so I made a status about it on Facebook. My boyfriend texted me soon after, freaking out because I never put anything on Facebook about him and how great he is. I'm basically dating a 14-year-old girl. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend posted a status on Facebook saying what a great girlfriend he had. Flattered, I commented on it, saying that I felt the same about him. Turns out he was talking about his other girlfriend. FML
Today, I logged onto facebook, and saw that one of my friends had just listed herself as in a relationship. I was happy for her, so I clicked the "like" button. Then I went to her page to see who her new boyfriend was. It was my boyfriend. FML
Today, I went out for coffee with my sister and my crush. I spent the majority of the date flirting with my crush, and when he dropped us off at home, I told him I had fun on our date. He looked at me surprised and said he'd thought I'd tagged along on his date with my sister. FML
Today, my sister made her engagement official on Facebook. When I shared the post to spread the word, people didn't read her boyfriend's name, and I started getting questions on why my sister and I were getting married. FML
Today, I wrote a text to the guy I've had a crush on for two years. I typed "hey" and put my phone down, not ready to send it. A little while later, I heard it buzz. The reply said "Um... what?" Apparently my sister had added "I'm a shitty prostitute" to my text and sent it. FML
Today, my little sister brought home her new boyfriend. He has an impressive job and is very charming and attractive. Apparently I'm the only one slightly bothered by the fact that he's 35 and she's 19. FML
Today, my boyfriend hacked my facebook account and set my status to say that I was in love with my boss. Seeing the post, my boss called me into his office, and told me he loved me too... FML
Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML
Today, I made a new friend at my college campus, which was great, until I added him on Facebook and he started liking posts from 3 years ago, asking if he could be my "dirty little secret" because he knows that I have a boyfriend. FML
Today, I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed and I noticed my boyfriend had commented on a post. It said, "Tag the hottest girl you know". Yeah, he tagged his ex. FML
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Top comments
Jseldi 10
Just make a few statuses about him and he'll get over it.
Cityrulezz 4
Does HE post about how great his girl is, too?
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Comments (93)
Cesar_malik 7
Oh well that gives me the idea that ur boy is really self obsessed and/or Show the world he exists :p
underthesea12 24
Dump that zero and find a hero!
barcas 3
Perhaps he is whiny, but perhaps he did a lot of nice things for you and you never acknowledged any of those in such manner and he is right to be pissed off.
Cagara_fml 10
copy paste this FML on ur Facebook status, and your problem is solved :)
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Welcome to Facebook, where any act of kindness has to be widely publicised to be valid.
Rag_dollxx 21
Where ANY act has to be widely publicised for it to be valid. If it's not on Facebook, it didn't happen.
gracehi 33
Yeah, it's funny how nowadays you're not officially dating someone until you both change your relationship status. It's also funny that the word "nowadays" is in my Swype dictionary.
weveallbeenthere 30
so make up something about how great he is. over exaggerate everything he did.
amisenho 11
"My man's so sweet, he ACTUALLY flushed the toilet after going number 2! And, as an added bonus, he doused the bathroom with cologne and made it smell like a desperate sewer on a hot date! I'MSOLUCKYOMG!!!!!"
worldclassrager 41
Maybe he needs to step up his game a bit or you just post about him a bit
doglover100 29
Does he write about how great you are?
holliepong 8
so does he post about you?
Butwhymeagain 12
idk if brother and sister or sister and sister -______-