Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw my cat in the bathtub while I was in it. I had to go to the emergency room to get my penis stitched up. FML
Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML
Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
Today, while in the shower, my roomates thought it would be really funny if they threw my cat in with me. The doctor who gave me the stitches also thought so. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be hilarious if she pulled a prank on me, so she did the classic "bucket of water on a door" one. I ended up getting stitches and a concussion on my birthday. FML
Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML
Today, I came back from break to find that my roommate had been shitting in the bathtub for the entire 2 weeks I had been gone. FML
Today, I arrived in my dorm at 3 am to find my roommate passed out and a nauseating stench. While I was gone, he got drunk and puked all over the walls, carpet, and both beds. His inebriated attempt to clean up the mess consisted of smearing his vomit everywhere with my shower robe. FML
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Top comments
nikininja 4
What a total brick!? You chute kick him out.
bwinski 19
Who throws a brick down a laundry-chute? Hope you heal up OP!
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Comments (68)
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Guess who should sue their roommate for the medical costs incurred.
floon_fml 13
This comment.... Is everything that's wrong with American society. Suing... Is not the answer to everything!! Someone sued their uncle for posting unflattering photos on Facebook. Seriously!? It's time for people to rethink their priorities. Money over family? Give me a break!
court_f 8
I agree with you to an extent... Suing over Facebook photos, that IS ridiculous, suing over someone throwing a brick down a laundry chute and now you have medical bills... Valid. There's malicious intent, what could someone possibly expect from Throwing down a brick otherwise??
Lionesse 15
Killer headaches are potentially on their way.. I'd stock up on Vicodin or Ibuprofen. Enough to last you a few weeks. I cracked my head 3 times before and I was constantly high on pain meds. Sorry OP. I Feel your pain. Literally.
davidn 0
Wh$re!!
miroslavracer 0
did they at least scream FOUR before hand
darawbs 0
*fore :D
livinginabook 24
You're lucky it's the hospital and not the morgue....
mosquito19 14
wait until he sleeps, kick him in the balls
adamcichuttek 2
I think maybe he knew you were down there. Sounds like it's time for a new roommate.
ElishaisSexy2016 9
I hope he/she came to see u at the hospital :/
TaffyMichele 9
If my roommate was like OP's, they'd be the last person I'd want visiting me in the hospital.
PhishloverA 14
Yes I agree the only chute you should ever stand under is a parachute unless you have a death wish
white16sox 19
Are you an idiot? OP was probably doing laundry and gathering laundry from under the chute.
keven501 12
I bet it was your roommate