Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw my cat in the bathtub while I was in it. I had to go to the emergency room to get my penis stitched up. FML
Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML
Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
Today, while in the shower, my roomates thought it would be really funny if they threw my cat in with me. The doctor who gave me the stitches also thought so. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be hilarious if she pulled a prank on me, so she did the classic "bucket of water on a door" one. I ended up getting stitches and a concussion on my birthday. FML
Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML
Today, I came back from break to find that my roommate had been shitting in the bathtub for the entire 2 weeks I had been gone. FML
Today, I arrived in my dorm at 3 am to find my roommate passed out and a nauseating stench. While I was gone, he got drunk and puked all over the walls, carpet, and both beds. His inebriated attempt to clean up the mess consisted of smearing his vomit everywhere with my shower robe. FML
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Top comments
nikininja 4
What a total brick!? You chute kick him out.
bwinski 19
Who throws a brick down a laundry-chute? Hope you heal up OP!
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Comments (68)
mikeofthunder 13
What were you doing in the laundry chute lol?
beccaishereyay 11
There's two openings to a laundry chute you know...
UrCapsLockOn 12
What happens in the the laundry chute stays in the laundry chute
KrazieKleo 13
Except for falling bricks from your idiotic roommate.
onlychildFTW 34
Why would you be under the opening in a laundry chute? What if someone threw dirty underwear down??? That wouldn't hurt but wouldn't be pleasant. You shouldn't stand under any type of chute ever!
XmyviolentheartX 13
Except a parachute, I mean if you want to live of course...
beccaishereyay 11
16- extremely valid comment.
hotshot2626 9
Uhh maybe they were gathering laundry to put a load in? Just a guess.
MormonPornstar 7
Well.. I think 3 has the best comment. Makes it easy to compare a chute to a ******. Nobody pits bricks in cooters, so you shouldn't put it in the chute.
MormonPornstar 7
5* Fan't rucking gead cood :(
Serythvalker 7
^ What did I just read?
patacus 14
26/27, ...wtf are you even saying?
ShyAnn29 15
When my brother and I were younger, we had a babysitter that let us play in the laundry chute we had, we got a rope, and she would hold one end while we would climb up the laundry chute, that babysitter didn't last very long, lol
Barhinder 9
Maybe the weight of the brick sent it flying like a projectile out of the chute
bwinski 19
Who throws a brick down a laundry-chute? Hope you heal up OP!
xlord 27
OP's roommate
MormonPornstar 7
Yeah, duh.. idiot
annie_nk 23
Kids.
Snoopy0718 14
What does OP mean?
nikininja 4
What a total brick!? You chute kick him out.
ASD_K 11
I totally agree with your puns. (P.S. "Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to..." F. Y. L. )
chippa 24
Your roommate after you beat the shit out of him/her?
TheMathMajor 26
I just have to say that your picture is really funny. XD
annie_nk 23
I'm imaging OP getting slapped around by a, uh, hand penis thing. Quite amusing.
orebes 3
Wrong place at the wrong time.
HSOMGF 5
You realize your roommate threw the brick because he knew you were in the laundry chute, right?
MormonPornstar 7
You realize you're just now realizing what the rest of us instantly realized?
Lunaa94 6
Realizeception!
kittenvks 11
I'm hoping you threw the brick at his face and made him go with you!
borkchop1992 15
Bad luck brian tries to do laundry
perdix 31
I'm putting my money on: 1) Tim Tebow 2) Ke$ha 3) Vladimir Putin How much do I win for guessing correctly?
Athleticism 11
Why was this thumbed down?
ohcheriecherie 20
Who the **** voted perdix down?
perdix 31
I'll bet it's a bunch of sore losers that were pissed off that I was going to win the Guessing Game. We have to wait for the OP to tell us the answer. Surely, it's got to be one of my guesses and I have a hunch who it i$ ;)
CeltHound 14
Kick them out...now!!