Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Go vegan
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan and threw all of MY meats, cheeses, chocolates and even beans for some reason in the trash, because he "doesn't need that kind of toxic waste" in his life. FML
Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML
Roomies
Today, I moved in with my new roommate. She's a vegetarian, and won't let me put my meat in the fridge because it will "contaminate her food". FML
Today, my vegetarian housemate cleaned the fridge. He threw away all of the meat in our fridge and made a nice sign stating "Meat is Murder". I was storing roughly $1000 worth of filet mignon steaks and seafood for my sister's wedding. FML
It's not a phase, Mom!
Today, my daughter, who is going through a vegan phase, pulled the plug for our garage chest freezer, where we store our meat. That's $1200 of meat, rotten. My husband is so mad that he's been at the gym for six hours straight. FML
Hypocrisy
Today, my roommate raged at me for "lying" about being a vegetarian, because she saw chicken stored in my side of the fridge. That chicken isn't for me, it's an ingredient in the homemade food I make for my dogs. Apparently, serving my dogs real meat instead of forcing them into vegetarianism makes me a hypocrite. FML
Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML
Never gonna happen
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by saying, "Good morning! We're going to be vegans from now on." FML
Today, after I cleaned out the fridge of things that expired months ago, my roommate got angry and insisted upon pulling all the moldy dairy products out of the garbage and putting them back because "they weren't mine and I shouldn't throw out other people's food." FML
Go, Vegan!
Today, my vegan sister told my kids where meat and dairy products come from, in a very detailed way. They now refuse to eat meat, and want to, "rescue all the poor animals." FML
Top comments
Welshite 40
I draw the line at chocolate.
culito_fml 10
You need to throw her out
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Comments (246)
Welshite 40
I draw the line at chocolate.
Lunaa94 6
Ice cream or gtfo. Unless it's white chocolate.
ICastillo 25
Why was white chocolate invented??..... Give up...So black people can get dirty too.
davestrider 0
I draw the line at the prime ribs
GothicAngel17 24
Chocolate? I draw the line at prime ribs! Chocolate is stepping over the line, looking back and giving the finger.
gracehi 33
15, I had to think about that joke before I understood it. You'll likely be modded or thumbed down to oblivion for it, but it's pretty mild, really.
gracehi 33
I was wrong. It was quietly deleted. Ignore my last comment.
rdemos 10
It's not a very good stash if she found it
Pleonasm 36
Well, obviously we have a vegan in Oklahoma. She's searchin' through yo cupboards, she's snatchin' food, tryin' to chuck 'em. So y'all need to hide yo ribs, hide yo icecream, and hide yo chocolate cause they throwin' out everything in here.
crazytwinsmom 25
NO! Not the chocolate!
Zoh_Aubrey 8
That's when I'd punch her. In the ******.
Kn0wledge123 21
Man, **** PETA. A bunch of self righteous assholes. I respect anyone who wants to go vegan, but that choice shouldn't be forced on anyone. I would make her pay me back for all the stuff she threw out!
evilplatypus 39
35 -It says stash, not secret stash. There's a difference. I keep a stash that anyone in my house can pick through and a secret stash of the good sh*t (sour patch kids, cry babies, and the good chocolates).
MDTeddy 13
How the hell does a video make you change what you eat? I understand dieting, but wtf?
ICastillo 25
105 a good old fashioned upper ****.
fmlerday19722 2
How many PETA members does it take to change a lightbulb? None, PETA members can't change anything.
jesustitts 20
PETA-People Eating Tasty Animals. That's what my dad calls it.
ShyAnn29 15
141, some of those videos can be pretty disturbingly graphic!
Frijolero_92 1
I draw the line at throwing out food
tacojauns 45
When I read your comment all I could think of is CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE! from Spongebob
xdaftpunkxloverx 10
I draw the line at someone throwing away food I paid for.
Rallred32 20
I draw the line at anything non-vegan
culito_fml 10
You need to throw her out
culito_fml 10
Or him ha
sonicgreg 12
Or decide to go carnivore. Cannibalism?
buhrittanyerin 6
"SHE began this.." I'm pretty sure it's a she.
onlychildFTW 34
No canniblaism people.
jacquesromualdez 12
Quick, where exactly did she throw those chocolates!
BunchieRules 31
OP's roommate may throw HER out, as she is a "non-vegan item". :p
louiseth 9
You once were a ve-gon, but now you will BE GONE. *kapow*
gardenwhipped3 14
Put a lock on the refrigerator and freezer and tell that crazy B**** to buy her own. Problem solved and it will be more fun that way.
AustinCarlile01 12
I couldn't agree more
buhrittanyerin 6
is she PETA approved?
onlychildFTW 34
People for Eating Tasty Animals? Because then I'm PETA approved. When you think about it being vegan or vegetarian isn't really great for your body. Humans are omnivores. Made to eat meat and vegetables.
ICastillo 25
PETA People Eating Tasty Animals. I love me some tasty animals so I'm PETA approved haha.
DelphiCat 17
Actually, being omnivorous doesn't mean we were made to eat both, it's more like we were designed to eat either - essentially, we eat whatever the hell we can get hold of (the three sisters- corn, squash and beans- for example, provide a nutritionally complete diet) However, that does not excuse what OP's flatmate did, it's people like that who give vegans a bad name, because 1.you can bet she won't have worked out a proper nutritious diet (and in all likelihood will in ten years time be going 'i tried to be vegan once, it's bad for you, i was malnourished' no shit sherlock, if you did it on a whim) 2. You can't impose it on other people, you can try to make them see things your way, but taking away all their food? Not the way to do that. And 3. That was just f***ing wasteful. The cow which supplied the ribs is already dead, you're already killed the next cow by creating demand for supply and at that point out of respect for the dead animal you may as well either eat it, or give it to someone who will. Wasting meat is as bad as buying it in the first place.
greatdanen 6
certified next level genious
saksxalmo 20
But a variety of foods IS healthier, so just because you CAN subsist only on non-meat doesn't mean you should. That said, a well-planned vegan diet can indeed be healthy for many people (not everyone, though.) I have no problem with vegans and vegetarians, but the evolutionary argument always annoys me. Research supports that the reasons for being vegan/vegetarian are personal moral convictions and personal health concerns. You can't argue that people as a whole should be vegan...
DelphiCat 17
Nutritionally complete is the same as healthy. If all your nutrition comes from plants you can be sure you're getting nothing but goodness, even 'fatty' fruits like avocado and banana are 100x better for you than 'fatty' meats such as bacon which have very little to offer nutrition wise. A properly planned out vegan diet is as healthy as they get. Also, the argument can be made that everyone should be vegan based upon environmental and population concerns. Firstly, plant production is a lot less polluting (CO2, streams, loss of biodiversity bacause land is cleared for grazing etc), secondly, as the basic rule of food chains is energy is lost at each stage of consumption, (if you eat corn you get all the energy, if you eat a cow which ate the corn energy is lost, if you eat a wolf that ate the cow that ate the corn even more energy is wasted) by being primary consumers we would be able to provide food for a lot more people (which as the world's population is increasing, it would be far more sensible)
saksxalmo 20
#157, you can be "nutritionally complete" if you put enough effort into anything. I'm sure you can find someone on a nutritionally complete insect diet, but if you're going for a natural "what I have access to" approach, as your definition of omnivore suggested, you'd be better off getting both. As for environmental concerns, I counted that under moral convictions. I'm aware that that's a reason that people become vegan/vegetarian. Also, I have seen a lot of contradictory statistics about what kinds of farming are most efficient and the impacts they have on the environment, so I'm sure you can understand my hesitance to just accept your uncited statistics as fact. There are also many arguments to be made in favor of raising various animals, though I can't think of them off the top of my head (things about topsoil, sustainability, unreliability of plants, other climate issues, etc.) I'm sure a quick Google search would show you that this isn't that simple of an issue. Not to mention the fact that farming isn't even the only way to raise/eat animals...
DelphiCat 17
No, nutritionally complete literally means nutritionally complete, there is no 'better off getting everything' Environmental concerns aren't really personal moral concerns as they effect everyone, they're more like societal moral concerns. Anyway the point is, you said "You can't argue that people as a whole should be vegan" and i'm just proving that you can argue it. I'm not actually going to, because, firstly i can't be arsed, and second, and most importantly, i'm not vegan. Maybe it was a poor choice of words on your part, but you really can argue it. :P
peachesncreem 21
157 - "the argument can be made that everyone should be vegan based upon environmental and population concerns." There are people in the population that will never be able to even consider being vegan due to dietary needs associated with specific illness. You can argue any point you like, but the fact is, some people really do need to eat meat/meat products.
saksxalmo 20
#175 - First, exactly what #182 said. You just can't say that *everyone* should be vegetarian or vegan, because it's just not possible for everyone. I didn't misstate what I meant. Second, you ignored my point that meat eating does not necessarily imply animal farming, therefore if you choose not to eat meat because it is associated with animal farming, that does strike me as more of a personal moral concern than a societal one. Especially if you consider the hierarchy of needs-- environmental concerns are much less important than getting proper nutrition with what's available. And "what's available" is important to my point-- like I said, many things can be nutritionally complete if you have access to a range of them, like meat. What I said was that based on the "omnivores eat what is there and don't go out of their way for food" argument that *you* used, it is nutritionally wiser and more efficient to simply eat what is available (i.e. both meat AND vegetables) and ensure more nutritional completeness than to waste time, energy, and resources to obtain a particular combination of non-meat to make yourself nutritionally complete. I never said that nutritionally complete vegan diets were worse than nutritionally complete omnivorous diets, only that naturally, humans are more able to obtain a nutritionally complete diet through eating both than by only eating one. Does this make sense to you?
iRiS890 5
This was one of the most boring "arguments" ever. Call someone a bitch and get the show on the road, please.
AngelOwl3 3
Just because it's in the house doesn't mean she needs to eat it. She should reimburse you for everything. By that I mean: get more chocolate.
ohSNAPyall 27
Right. Good on her for trying to better herself, but she shouldn't try to control other people's actions. It's rude and will stir up resentment.
Albarufus 13
Hide meat in her food. Getting rid of chocolate should be punishable by death!
P374RD3D 9
I agree. Same with bacon and Nutella. I've heard some fairs have chocolate covered bacon. I really, REALLY want to try it.
doodlecloud 27
Just because she was selfish doesn't mean you have to resort to that. Talk to her about it and get her to buy more stuff to replace the other stuff. Don't be a dick by tricking her into going against her beliefs and putting something she doesn't want to in her body. That's disgusting.
jekyllf 13
Eh, while I love chocolate and I love bacon, I always thought the combination of both is incredibly overrated.
Demonfish 14
37- yes it does, I'd have thrown her, along with all her belongings, out of a window.
thatKidzmOm 10
38-her beliefs? She decided this on a whim and then disposed of stuff that wasn't hers in the first place! That's not a belief system...that's just stupid
BlowinChronic 18
Vegetarian is an ancient word created by the Natives meaning: A person who can't hunt.
Mikeskinner 7
Oh **** you. Someone throws my stiff out they're buying my more shit and I will make their lives mother-******' miserable.
SaySayGurl 10
That's dumb. If someone did that to me I'd probably strangle them. That's just wrong, no matter what she did.
Shadow_Phantom 26
Ugh. She should really do more research on the negative things PETA does before making any more brash decisions... they're not all "sunshine and daisies yay animals," like they claim to be. FYL hard, OP.
gracehi 33
There was a beach town where someone got attacked by a shark. PETA tried to put up a billboard picturing a shark with a human leg in its mouth with the caption "Payback." Luckily, all the billboard owners in that town had souls and refused to sell the advertising space to them.
doodlecloud 27
Seriously?! Ugh...I guess that makes them like the Westboro Baptist Church of the vegan/veggie world...
Legendoflaw 4
Good on the sales people, but I'm sure it was more like "If we sell this space to these crazies, we'll never get a sale again!" Maybe that's just my outlook on the majority of sales people.
annie_nk 23
Only 2% of the animals they save go to homes. The other 98% are "euthanized humanly" meaning a blunt force to the head.
gracehi 33
69, I'm sure that was part of it, but I'd bet they were genuinely offended by the ad hemselves.
gracehi 33
*themselves
DelphiCat 17
@#78 most of the animals signed over to peta are signed over to be put down, because of illness and infirmity - so it's difficult for them to re home more than 2% as they're really only meant to be providing a dignified death, they're not really a 'shelter'...
TheDrifter 24
The worst one I've heard was the LA chapter of PETA using a dozen dogs for an ad, then "euthanizing" them with a hammer and dumping them in a garbage can behind the studio. PETA is pretty much the whack jobs giving animal rights activists a bad name.
P374RD3D 9
Here's my theory: PETA claims to be an animal rights group because people love puppies and kitties, so it's an easy way to get lots of henchmen.
P374RD3D 9
Their real motive is to take over the world. Dammit, my mind went blank and I hit send before finishing, and I ran out of time to edit.
astralvagan 20
I would have been pissed about the chocolate.... Just because she wants to be vegan, she shouldn't force it on you.....
Posthuman 26
Hide laxatives in her next salad, or tie her to a chair and force bacon down her throat
HisGirl8272012 2
How about ipecac? That would be hilarious.
ICastillo 25
Get rid of her now before she finds the Bacon!!!
ManInTheMachine 20
Things like this piss me off to no end. Talk about zero respect. Does your roomate have no self-control? Just because it's in the house doesn't mean she has to eat it. It's like people that complained that McDonalds doesn't have any healthy food choices. Don't ******* eat there if you don't think it's healthy, dammit, and don't throw it out if you don't have to eat it. Sorry for the rant, I'm done.
TrailblazerSS 5
Thank you somebody who finally agrees with me. I'm sick of vegetarians and vegans trying to force their bullshit and guilt-trips on to the people who eat meat.
Legendoflaw 4
Agrees with you? I think most people feel exactly the same as you, OP and I feel. We just keep our mouths shut because it's either not politically correct, we might hurt their feelings (like they care about ours) or you're looking to get sued... And lose because most judges have empathy toward idiots.
bankrupt 15
Yes to all of the above. These self-righteous twits get on their high horses and think they have the right to make decisions for the rest of us because they're 'right' and we're 'wrong.' No, it's just a difference of opinion but one person thinks they can force their opinion on the other one. I personally like my place on the food chain. Bring on the steaks!
mizuki123 8
I hear meat is "bad" for you because of hormones and what not.. But wouldn't veggies and what not be "unhealthy" because of the pesticides and chemicals they use to make them grow? Idk I could be wrong..
olpally 33
We didn't climb to the top of the food chain to eat carrots... Lol... If someone asks me how I'm helping save the environment... I'm eating the cow... Lol. You're welcome, PETA... Vegetarians are ridiculous.
ManInTheMachine 20
olpally- I think you mean IGNORANT vegetarians. Not all vegans and vegetarians impose their views on everyone. I know a good amount of vegans and vegetarians that are completely understanding and respectful of the fact that I am not one. No generalizations, please. Thanks. All I'm saying is that if you don't like it, don't expect everyone to change for you. That goes for people are and are not vegetarians. No partiality.
olpally 33
Ahh thanks mitm... Sorry.
ManInTheMachine 20
No worries, I was just making myself clear.
amandajlucas2015 2
#89 what ur talkin about with meat being bad for u with the hormones and stuff I think ur talking about coming from when breeders would put medicine in the animals foods to help them stay healthy because most of the time the meat u buy from Walmart came from cows who grew up in pens all cramped together in their own poo so they aren't in very healthy conditions. But u can buy pasture raised cow meat especially if u buy direct from the buyer that is the best way to go or going to a meat market their meat is also higher quality.. As for the vegetables and pesticides u are supposed to wash the vegetables off before u eat them.. Ya they spray pesticides on them but that is too keep bugs off.. Every single farmer does that tho.. Wash ur vegetables and fruits before consumption and u won't get sick
DelphiCat 17
Thank you ManInTheMachine! everyone above you was using the same rash generalisations and diet abuse they were complaining about receiving! I'm so glad not everyone tars normal vegetarians/vegans with the crazy-hipster-vegan brush!
HungerGames95 13
Amen. I don't sit there and judge vegans/vegetarians for not eating meat, and they shouldn't judge people who eat meat.
mizuki123 8
I don't really eat meat.. Or basically much Anyways so idk lol.