Today, I found out that the doctors accidentally perforated my left ear drum performing a routine wax syringing. I was at the doctor's for a completely different reason, having crushed my pinky at the gym. They can't fix either and my finger needs surgery, which can't happen until next week. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my excruciating ear pain turned out to be a bastard maggot eating away at all the vital things behind my eardrum. The doctor pulled it out, but I’m now permanently deaf in that ear and can’t balance. I fall if I try to stand or walk further than 5 feet. FML
Today, something blocked my ear. I couldn't get it out, so I went to Urgent Care so I didn't pop my eardrums. Turns out my allergies made my ears stop draining. After they rinsed my ears, I can now hear almost nothing. FML
Today, my right ear drum ruptured. My family doesn't understand that I only lost hearing in one ear and continues to talk about me behind my back, thinking I can't hear them. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse stuck the Otoscope into my ear to look, she was disgusted. When she pulled it out, she told me that I had an ear infection, and that she'd popped a pimple in there by mistake. FML
Today, I spent the first day of my senior year in the ER because my new ear piercing got so infected that the doctors had to cut the earring out. FML
Today, I went to a doctor's appointment to figure out why I've suddenly started going deaf. As it turns out, for some reason my ears now produce wax at an alarmingly fast rate. "Enough to make an entire candle before long if you save it up," the doctor said when she cleared them out. I guess this is my life now. FML
Today, I was cleaning wax out my ears when my wife came barrelling into the bathroom, desperate to pee. The door slammed right into the side of my head and the cotton swab I was using was pushed all the way in and ruptured my eardrum. FML
Today, I was taking my earrings out and thought I had lost the back of one. Turns out my ear infection has caused the flesh of my ear to grow around and engulf the back of my earring and it is still stuck in there. FML
Today, I had surgery done to fix an ingrown toenail. When the doctor started cutting the nail, my toe wasn't entirely numb. FML
Today, I got surgery on one of my hands. I opted for a local anesthetic instead of being put all the way under. I soon discovered my hand hadn't gone completely numb when the doctor started slicing into the finger that needed operating on. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Routine wax syringing for a crushed pinkie? *cough* unnecessary procedure *cough* How did your routine mammogram and routine prostate exam go?
Ainarr 29
literally everyone calls it the pinky finger
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Comments (7)
bluhbluhbluh 14
I smell a huge lawsuit.
Skydome6666 6
ydi for still using the term pinky.
Ainarr 29
literally everyone calls it the pinky finger
riley873 21
what the hell else are you supposed to call the fourth finger?
gring40 10
Have an otologist look at it, and don’t let it get wet. Probably will heal on its own, but play it safe. Your doc should be using a rubber bulb syringe for wax flushing.
RichardPencil 32
Routine wax syringing for a crushed pinkie? *cough* unnecessary procedure *cough* How did your routine mammogram and routine prostate exam go?
Amanda Jaworski 23
Patient: Hi doc, I crushed my finger at the gym, I think it’s broken? Dr: Ok, but how about your ears? Bizarre....