Today, my parents had a fight as to which one of them is the most cultured. As a result, they've begun writing my chore lists in a variety of languages. If I don't do them, I'm grounded. I only speak English. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my parents grounded me because I refused to do my little sister's homework for her. FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, my mom tried to ground me. In the apartment that I own. Because I didn't eat enough of the dinner that I'd made. FML
Today, my parents woke me up and grounded me for the "disrespectful" things I said to them in my sleep. Apparently I say these things every night, and each time I do they extend the grounding. FML
Today, my parents accused me of being secretive. I have no idea what they're talking about; all I do is work, go to school, sleep, and eat. Now I'm grounded until I tell them what's going on. I have crazy parents, that's what's going on. FML
Today, my mom hit me in the face after an argument she didn't win. According to her, Mexican and American are languages, and not dialects or nationalities. She even argued with my teachers, and threatened to remove me "from a school full of uneducated people" after they told her I was correct. FML
Today, my parents tried to apologize for wrongly grounding me. I told them to go fuck themselves, so now I'm re-grounded. FML
Today, my parents threw a hissy fit calling me ungrateful and disrespectful for wanting to do laundry and clean at home, instead of going out to their friends' house for dinner. They also disconnected the Internet to punish me when they left. I'm 20 and visiting home on a college break. FML
Today, my parents are upset that I never ask them for help with my homework and struggle with it myself. They won't accept the answer that whenever I do, they're always yelling at me and putting me down. Dad in particular can't get through one assignment without becoming a screaming tyrant about my handwriting. FML
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
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Top comments
tingway 4
use google translate?
Llama_Face89 34
37- there's this exciting new thing called a "keyboard"! It actually let's you type words into the computer! Far fetched, I know but it's true!
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Comments (60)
marit1997 4
time to learn a language. I speak Dutch and English fluently and I'm still learning French and german.. well I'm european so it's ok xd
eatmyshortssss1 8
OH MY GOD AREN'T YOU JUST THE BEES KNEES
Northside6934 0
Use google translator duh!
dwsgirl 8
Do you know what languages they speak? Google translate doesn't help much unless you know what languages your translating from and into - and even then... Try posting it on here, maybe someone on-line can help. I speak 3 languages fluently, another roughly, and am learning a 5th. Or settle the score and point out that neither of them bothered to teach you any of these languages and therefore failed together.
joa76 3
Actually, Google translate has a detect language feature, so not knowing wouldn't be too much of an issue, unless maybe it's a different word in multiple languages.
firebirdtransam 3
google translate
latestcrazegirl5 5
Just clean the whole house perfectly and do any outside things you do. Tada!! No bad outcome:)
lebronsucks 3
O have taken Spanish 3 years and speak it fluently.
phillsand 1
There's an app for that
MadRoo 6
Well one thing's for certain.. they're both more cultured than you.
kemando 22
Just do everything you think needs to be done, then when they say "we didn't ask you to do that", just say "how the hell was I supposed to know, I don't read Gaelic".
darthrawn 0
Use one of the online translator programs and use it to write them responses using languages they do not understand. ;)