Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, my 8 year-old little sister said, "F*** you" to my mom. My mom thought I told her to say that and grounded me for a month. Later, my sister came up to me and said, "Gotcha, bitch." FML
Today, I got punched in the face after I beat my stepbrother at Mario Kart. I didn't really get hurt, but he managed to break a finger. My stepmom blamed the whole thing on me, accusing me of being violent and a bad influence on her son. FML
Today, my husband and son ganged up on me in a game of Mario Kart. I threw the game down and stormed off. The last thing I saw was them high-fiving and yelling "RAGE QUIT" and laughing hysterically. They will both suffer for this. FML
Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML
Today, my mom tried to ground me, even though I moved into my own flat to escape her. I told her 'my flat, my rules' so she tried to confiscate my Xbox because 'she’s the boss of me.' The look on her face as the cops took her away was worth the shouting match we’ll have when she makes bail. FML
Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML
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Top comments
billyboef 10
at least you won the game
lowkeybelieber 7
What a bitch
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Comments (140)
dustin007 15
You Mit have won the game but UR mum won the life game >:)
thisguy22 33
I'm sure you're right. You got grounded for your mom being a sore loser, not you calling her a bitch... makes sense.
weaslette_fml 7
Mario destroying families since 1983
howeidoit 6
Well if she dose that then she is a bitch
jackycat 17
Your mom did overreact a bit. I mean your birthday for that, that's too harsh. You still shouldn't have said it, especially with her annoyed already. Timing is the key to successful jokes. Hopefully, when she calms down she'll ease up and realize that it was just a poorly timed joke.
brendejafulable 41
You are obviously not grounded enough if you are able to post to this website..
Lisa13Mar 4
Ive seen this before, to a T. Not on FML, but Ive seen this joke before.
LadyTyger51ne 8
Wellllllll, you did sort of ask for that......
SlyCooper15 16
That was seriously slick though.
DoubleDosexo 12
um no, because you called her a bitch. if I was your mom and saw this, I'd ground you for longer, because you obviously don't understand the reason
Axel5238 29
Agreed, the mom said it as an exclamation. OP doesn't get why it was wrong and I'm guessing those thinking it was unfair are around the age of the OP and/or don't get it either. YDI OP
mikbrooke 25
i think its unfair, i get it though, and im 20. things are said in the heat of the moment WITHOUT thinking. sure, its his mother. but she probably said 'son of a bitch' in the heat of the moment due to losing. it happens. grounding is a bit of an overreaction.
Thunderstruck14 30
If someone insults you, there are better ways to fix the problem that locking them up for two weeks and not letting them have fun on their birthday. She could have just said, "You crossed the line." or "That's not okay to say to people." Some people insult their family and friends in a friendly way. Its called joking around. Nothing wrong there. Well, if someone insults you don't like it and you don't think its funny, just let them know. Why can't parents just let their kids know when they made a mistake? Why does saying the wrong thing mean a person should have to be grounded for two weeks?
Axel5238 29
All too often without punishment it doesn't really sink in unfortunately. There has to be more than a warning . Things you do have consequences and the punishment isn't always going to be light.