Today, my mother told me I should volunteer in Africa, because I might "get lucky, catch malaria and come back skinny". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after coming back from a trip to Africa where I got malaria, I went to the hospital for some blood tests. The doctor said, "Good news! You never had malaria! But they put you through a lot of dangerous treatments and now your liver has an anomaly." FML
Today, while visiting my parents, I observed that I've been able to visit more often because I've avoided getting sick the whole year. My mother responded by reminding me that I need to get my act together if I'm going to lose weight and get healthier. Not the reaction I hoped for, Mom. FML
Today, my mum was saying she needs to gain weight because she was underweight according to her doctor. She then said she's going to eat like me in order to gain more weight. FML
Today, I came home from a four month stay in Africa, where I managed to avoid suffering any serious illness. Some hours after my first meal back at home, I got food poisoning. FML
Today, I went to a hospital in Uganda, where I'm working with an NGO for the summer. I had a high fever and other symptoms of malaria. They gave me a test, and I don't have malaria. I'm now however sick from the water they gave me to wash down a medication to reduce fever. FML
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, I learned that because of my new medication, I can either avoid getting malaria, or have a male yeast infection. I'm stuck in Africa for the next two months, and have to sit down to pee because I don't want to irritate my penis by touching it. FML
Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML
Today, for Mother's Day, I surprised my Mother with the news I that I'll be visiting in June. The last time we got to visit was 4 years ago, we live 4000 miles apart and it's a very expensive trip. She said, "No, come next June, I want to lose some more weight before seeing you." FML
Today, I told my mom that I'm bulimic and have been for a few years, and that I needed help. She responded by saying, "Well that's clearly not working for you. Why don't you try anorexia?" She then patted me on the head, smiled, and walked away. FML
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Top comments
Wizardo 34
Tell her to take a trip to the sun, she might get a heart after it thaws out.
RedPandax 23
That incredibly insensitive. She should volunteer in Africa. It might make her a more nicer person, it sounds like she's needs it.
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Comments (67)
merju_enchee 1
Your mom's an asshole, but that's not even how malaria works. It's like getting a wicked bad flu- you can still eat and drink; it doesn't affect your digestion.
juicy_extasy 25
Harsh! Sorry OP!
pleasedie 22
Wow. Sorry but your mom sounds like a massive bitch.
worldclassrager 41
Are you paying for the ticket? Then you go somewhere where you have a large chance of not having an issue...like South Africa
Grayness_ 26
I laughed too hard at this. Might be a wake up call tho.
mld4657 28
You're mom sounds like an insensitive bitch on one level. If you feel like you need to lose weight do it the healthy way. But if you're comfortable then don't sweat it
manilovethisshit 15
this is one of the most ******* offensive, extreme examples of racial propagation. africa isn't running rampid with malaria. it's like saying china is full of bird flu or that the U.S. is full of STDs. so I'd really appreciate if "strayy" could stfu.
interesting33 37
#28, you know #25 can say they are offended by it. It isn't being childish to be angry at racist things. It isn't right to say OP should shut up though since it was their mother that said it - not them.
leogachi 15
@25 *rampant The rest of your comment just sounds like terrible trolling.
vikky538 29
Tel her to come to india. She can get some chikun gunia and that might help her brain get fixed a but
FitFriday 32
Well, that's ****** up
mongoosemike 23
25, if you don't like it you can get the **** out. This is FML, not a nursery.