Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle just above my breasts. She said, "If I can see this, ever, your shirt is either too low cut or too see through and it will be thrown away." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, to avoid walking on a thumbtack that had fallen on the floor, my little sister took a red sharpie to the carpet and drew a circle around it, "so that way, everyone will see it." FML
Today, my mom and I were looking at dresses for me at the mall. The cashier pointed out a dress, and my mom said, "She's definitely not going to fit into that. She's too flat-chested." FML
Today, my six year old daughter cut out the stomach area of four of my favorite shirts. When I asked her why she had done so she replied, "So that they fit your tummy better, Mommy." FML
Today, my mother had a full-on hissy fit because of the clothes I was wearing. Not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because I was "stealing her look." FML
Today, I must find a gentle way to tell my 71-year-old mother that she's too old to be wearing shirts that expose her belly. FML
Today, I had a rubber band around my wrist for too long, and it ended up leaving faint red marks around my wrist. My mom saw them, thought they were scars, and is now convinced I'm a cutter, "like the ones I've seen on the news," and won't believe my story. FML
Today, I returned a shirt for my mom. When the cashier asked why, I just said my mom didn't like the way it looked. After an awkward pause, I noticed the cashier was wearing the same shirt. She was not amused. FML
Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML
Today, my mom said I should start wearing push up bras to make myself look better. I was wearing one when she said that. FML
Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML
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Top comments
ollie179 21
Why would you let her go near your breasts with a sharpie?
YakuzaxGeneralz 9
How did you let her finish the entire circle? How did you not see her coming with a bright sharpie. Your mother must be a ninja.
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Comments (233)
Shippo454 10
I hope not too much of your wardrobe is now trash. On the bright side, you wont have to worry about awkward clothing malfunctions anymore.
Sierz 0
Unless she wears something a bit see through but her mom didn't see it and she goes to school for everybody to see the red circles showing through her shirt...awkward
BIGBOY4rmAHM 19
How old are you? If your under 18 then she has every right. Her house, her rules.
samsea 5
Mothers know best.
randomreader2315 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Buy low cut shirt, cover circle with sticker. Problem?
Sierz 0
Sticker visible, look like dumbass, mom gets pissed. Problem.
samsea 5
Just use soap not that hard to figure out.
unclebunny 7
Who exactly puts stickers on their chests? Maybe a five year old.
zebraface 15
Anti-tramp stamp. Genius.
Poetaster 10
What, no aspirin between the knees??
Enslaved 38
Wow, I haven't heard that expression in a while!(: I'm sure it's on the mom's short list.
RedPillSucks 33
She has to leave room for Jesus... what? Wrong metaphor?
Sierz 0
Wish my mom would do this to my sister! But seriously, if the circle is too high, then wash it off, and draw it lower if she checks for it :p
Jamicianprince 1
Skecty
zyxwvutsrqponmlk_fml 0
Your spelling is sketchy.
bobslawnservice 16
Wear short mini-skirts instead.
csosa187 1
You must have amazing breasts