Today, my mom's dog saw a cat in our yard. I watched as he tried to jump at it, only to smack face-first into the window. He did this twice more before curling up on the floor and whimpering pitifully. When my mom came in and saw him there, and me laughing, she accused me of beating him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sitting in my room watching TV when I heard my mother obnoxiously yelling for the dog. Minutes later she stomped into my room, swatted me over the head, and yelled at me for not answering when she called. She actually got my name mixed up with the dog's. FML
Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML
Today, I was eating and my dog kept bothering me. She kept scratching my legs for food, so I took a large piece of fish from my plate and tossed it out into the hallway. It flew right into my mother's face. FML
Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML
Today, I was feeding my pets and playing with my puppy when I suddenly felt something behind me. My cat is on the arm of the couch steadily spanking my butt with his paw. I can't win! FML
Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML
Today, I accidentally hit my dad in the eye with our dead dog's squeaky toy. He cried. FML
Today, my cat tried to jump up to the window, and missed. This would have been hilarious if I had not been sleeping under that same window, and then caught him with my face. FML
Today, a bird ran into my window. My overzealous cat ran at it like the Flash and smashed his face in the window. He yelped and ran away, then as I was running to see if he was OK, I slammed my face in the door jamb. FML
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Top comments
dweeds508 24
Just tell her of what you saw
cristy91 33
Chances are the dog hasn't learned his mistake, so just wait till that pesky cat passes by and take out your phone. The video should be solid proof as well as a possible YouTube sensation.
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Comments (58)
dweeds508 24
Just tell her of what you saw
whyisitme12 19
Yea, likes she going to believe that the dog got out smarted by a cat.
jacsoccerdude3 10
Windex commercial anyone?
Ian7890 23
Ya #1 because that probably never occurred to him. You sir, have just solved the whole problem.
RoboCunnilingus 23
No need to be a dick, man.
K410 18
Lol bet the crows hanging out by the clothesline had a good laugh :p
TheCanucklehead 22
Ops history of animal abuse doesn't help her case
gracehi 33
"Your dog is so stupid it hurts."
MidnaLink 35
No,12. The dog got outsmarted by a window.
AudreyDePew 8
WINNING
PterodactylMan 23
No it's not winning, OP got in trouble
Debragga99 6
LOSING
gracehi 33
Ugh. Who says that anymore? Charlie Sheen is such a pathetic loser. I don't understand why people used to idolize that moron.
OneGirlTwoCups 13
Not such a badass dog is it?
tomgun_fml 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You laugh at animal pain not funny
ashleighlaine 21
more like animal stupidity.
rawr_ily96 24
Don't go all PETA on us. The dog was likely not hurt, besides its bruised self-esteem, and maybe a sore nose from running into the window. Some people think of their pets in the same way they do their human friends, and you can't tell me you wouldn't laugh at your friend if they did something similar like walk into a glass door they thought was open.
flashback.miss 28
Ow, poor dog. should've pulled him away from the window after the first time until the cat left.
Uramonkey 11
OP just assumed the dog was smarter than a fly.
cristy91 33
Chances are the dog hasn't learned his mistake, so just wait till that pesky cat passes by and take out your phone. The video should be solid proof as well as a possible YouTube sensation.
klutchh4 9
damn, poor dog
tehman117 21
Show her the window smudges and the cat
brave_josh 9
"Today, I tried to get this ass of a cat. He tricked me into smacking my face into the glass. It has been ruff. WML (wuff my life)."
PenguinBitch 44
If it was the cat (mml) "meow my life 1out of 9...
fml1365 30
You mean cats have nine life's?
smilez1990 8
on a positive note that's hilarious. ... did u explain it to her though?