Today, I started a new job. I noticed all the beautiful women. Then I tripped on a cord running across the floor. They noticed me too. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked into work to see my boss's hot son. I wanted him to notice me, so I did my "sexy walk". I then slipped and fell onto my desk, broke my desk, and sprained my wrist. Oh he noticed me alright. FML
Today, I tripped over a "wet floor" sign at work and hit the floor hard. The floor wasn't even wet. FML
Today, I tripped over a kid at work. She was sitting on the floor with her legs sticking out into the walkway. Her mom caused a scene, accusing me of doing it on purpose. FML
Today, at work, I tripped and fell face-first into a food display. As I picked myself up, totally humiliated, I tripped again and fell right back into it, earning a bunch of pitying looks from nearby customers. FML
Today, I went in for an interview for my first ever job. Just seconds after meeting the boss, I slipped on the linoleum floor. I was wearing a skirt. FML
Today, while at work, I walked head first into the edge of a clothing rack. I was looking right at it. People saw. FML
Today, was my first day at a new job. I was really pleased with how much positive attention I was getting in a mainly male office. Guess whose shirt was see-through. FML
Today, my friends were making fun of my clumsiness. I replied that I was not clumsy, and to prove it I was going to go the whole day without messing up. As I said this, I tripped over an extension cord and hit my head on a desk. FML
Today, I slipped at work while putting out a "wet floor" sign to make sure the customers didn't slip. FML
Today, I started my new job. It seems my colleagues are moronic pranksters, because when I leaned back in my chair, the backrest came apart and I fell to the ground, to much laughter. My boss immediately shouted at me to, "Stop fucking about." I thought this only happened in movies. FML
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Top comments
Thisismypchere 8
embarrassing, but really, it's not THAT bad.
ninjaniki 0
You fell head over heels for them eh?
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Comments (78)
Thisismypchere 8
embarrassing, but really, it's not THAT bad.
MetalxSoldier 26
I guess he is literally falling for his coworkers!
katieeamberr 2
Agreed Alan. These types of FMLs are my favorite
adzz90 16
Thats a trip hazard at work you should tell someone to sort it out!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
You be trippin', fool. Oh god my grammar!
jessicaazzzzzzzz 3
That's when you say: Sorry guys, my penis is just so big it throws off my balance sometimes.
FMMFL1992 3
Alan's always butting in.
RedPillSucks 33
Alan's got a big ol' butt, Oh Yeah!!!
thatoneguy79 10
1 - You are correct in that it is not THAT bad, though still enough to make someone think "F my like". Of course, were he walking across a catwalk 50' off the ground, tripped over a poorly placed cord, and fell 49' before the cord that had not only tripped him but also wrapped itself around his foot prevented him from smashing into the aforementioned ladies, that would be a little worse. Glad that didn't happen OP. Did it?
Cappiej 18
On the bright side: You had the beauties' attention.
gamercanadian 11
For a sec I actually thought OP was a woman, but I believe I was wrong.
lolretard 0
I refuse to believe you.
SuperKnuckels 6
goodjob OP starting with an icebreaker is always good than jut waiting lol.
Devin91 20
Beautiful woman will do that to some people.
nia1oo1 0
What is it with people like this guy who thinks its cool to have his picture of his body. NO ONE CARES WHAT YOUR BODY LOOKS LIKE MATE! Gosh darn
nancyschmancy 9
Speak for yourself. I kind of like the eye candy! I'm sure all the gay guys do too!
ikickgingers 15
^^fatass
DustyStorm 16
If you've got it, flaunt it.... Some of us really appreciate looking at people who care enough to work on their bodies. If you don't care then chances are you are one "suffering" from the epidemic suddenly trapping the world in self loathing....ie. too much fast food, not enough fast workout.
luckyd880 12
Oh I don't mind at alllll :)
sirsquab 12
@ #19 - I don't see what the problem is. If you really didn't care what his body looked like, why did you start a... thread? about it? (Dunno what to call it.) Anyways, I don't enjoy topless men, but if I have to see a topless guy, I'd rather see a well-built one then a fat one. Doesn't hurt my eyes or anything. As for the guy tripping... when I was like 13, I went to Tim Hortons after school, on the way back I was watching some hot girls, and totally tripped on the curb and spilled Ice Cap all over myself. Embarrassing lol.
DontForgetMe4 0
Hopefully they all ran to help you up, and coo over you. No? Well, you can always dream. Good luck.
ninjaniki 0
You fell head over heels for them eh?
raauul_4 5
Way to make a good first impression.
klovemachine 24
Doesn't matter, no sex!
Cappiej 18
I see what you did there. ... No? Okay :(
klovemachine 24
It sounded funnier in my head :/
ApologyKick 25
Probably where it should've stayed
KiddNYC1O 22
No sex, KYS. Nah, I'm joking.
ycrem0n 21
Girl, I can notice but to, notice you, noticing me
Cappiej 18
Umm... What?
xxdark 3
Song lyrics.
eliiin 0
Doesn't make any sense at all...
ikickgingers 15
Noticing you... Noticing me...
LesCDeal 6
Hey, it's not your fault that your new workplace has a fire code violation.
Il_Maestro 6
Good point. FML likely recommends you quit, sue, and break up with your significant other. Or do what normal people would do and put tape over the extension cord.
lopsop 12
When this happens usually they laugh and then forget about it. But laugh it off for now.