Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML
Today, my mother is such a helicopter parent, she wouldn’t let me go to my first appointment with my new gynaecologist without being in the room, to “keep an eye on him”. When I told her to stay out, she started screaming in the waiting room that I was going to be raped without her there. FML
Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML
Today, for the fifth time in a row, I woke up screaming from a nightmare. My mother burst into my room, leaned in real close and said, "So help me God, if you do not stop fucking screaming, I will rip your arms off and beat you with them." I’m never sleeping again. FML
Today, my mom had me arrested in the most humiliating way ever, in my nightgown, with no bra. She pushed me out her vagina, and now her life. FML
Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML
Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons in self defense. My mom told me that I didn't need them because my face was a better weapon to repel anyone. FML
Today, I went into the house, only to hear my mother shouting "DON'T PINCH MY NIPPLE" at the top of her lungs in the shower. FML
Today, my mother straight up admitted that she would murder me if God told her to. FML
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Top comments
Nudi_fml 13
Sounds reasonable
mnblkjpoi 0
That seems legit.
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Comments (212)
kayseelayne 3
Sounds like she's talking from very specific experience....or maybe she read some article
Darlena830 0
Rapists are the type of people that attack the weak. Scream, yell, claw, bite and fight them off with all your strength. Don't let them rape, try to stop them. Plus if you scream there's a chance someone will hear you.
nabila21 0
If you're moms flat chested the she knows best but if she's not shes crazy ! ( no offense moms .:. I'm crazier than u )
AaronGuy 12
Does your mother speak from experience?
TheEpicPies 15
Uh...
lilpsyco 16
What your address again. It's for um a survey ya a survey
Chris20003 17
Yes because we do not want to upset the rapist. Lord knows what could happen if people hear you, they may even rescue you... the horror...
isuckok 11
Sounds like she has experience.
VixieRattler 9
huh ... sounds like a serious scenario ... well we all better be careful
hungergames164 7
Wtf did I just read