edulover
United States
Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
DaoOfPow
Danbury, United States
Today, my mom told me I'm the reason she's going to kill herself one day. FML
anonymous
Ridgewood, United States
The bird's the word
Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML
simon
Mommy's boy
Today, my mother, who insists on sticking her nose into every aspect of my life, found out I'm only "middle management" and called my boss to criticize her for undervaluing me, demanding I be promoted immediately. I'm now the laughing stock of my office. FML
apple
Netherlands
Today, it's my 18th birthday. I was telling my friends a story when my mom started talking. I simply said 'Mom...' so she'd realize she interrupted me. She gave me the finger and called me rude in front of all my friends. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I asked my mom why nobody likes me. She reeled off about a dozen reasons. FML
Anonymous
Isn't it ironic, don't you think?
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Anonymous
Keeping up
Today, I found out that my mother has been telling everybody that I’m a lesbian, because both of her best friends have at least one gay child each, and she was feeling left out. This explains why people have been treating me differently the last few weeks. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Roll with it
Today, my mom rolled up the car window on my fingers. She thought my yelling and crying was because I was throwing a tantrum. I'm 26. FML
anonymous
United States
Today, my mom said that if I wasn't her daughter, she probably wouldn't even like me. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Akron, United States
My life
Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML
Top comments
giantsfan2010 23
Tell your mom she's the reason douches were invented.
Rawrzie 0
well, without you we wouldn't have any fun.
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Comments (81)
The_Creeper_fml 8
Deal with it fartface.
ICaughtFire 4
Fartface.. Nice.
sweet_candy_ 17
lol that's funny.
aford15 1
that made my day:)
riotbby 0
lol nice name (fartface) lmao!!
zanguard 0
Well OP, if you are the reason we have middle fingers then I would like to thank you as I use mine on a regular basis.
noto_fml 0
I just wanted to point out that just to reassure you YES YOU ARE A ******* CROCODILE that's about it.
zanguard 0
Thank you, I've recently been contemplating my true identity and was concerned that I might in fact be an alligator.
lakaiskateco 0
but we had middle fingers before you were born:P did you tell your mom she's a complete DUMBASS?!?!:D
The_Creeper_fml 8
Whoah there. Don't make assumptions. For all we know, OP could be some 30 billion year old superbeing with super awesome superpowers.
beauty2646 0
Lmao, honesty is the best policy?
BubbaDoose 0
you must be a major douche bag!
kissyxoxo 0
My middle finger is for unclogging toilets.
ruby84 1
owned by your mother! tell her "mom, you're the reason child-social-services was put in place"
brewedintexas96 0
I'm sure that's not the only drain you use it for unclogging...
hideyoself 4
either your mom is a straight up ***** or you are a real pain in the ass. i'm guessing it's a healthy combo of both
ICaughtFire 4
Please, tell me how you've come to the conclusion that OP's mom is a *****.
condog95 0
haha - coming fron the one that raised you!