Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML
Today, my drunk mom told me to apologize for being born. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML
Today, my drunken mother told me I'm just like my father and that I don't give a fuck about her. She's living in my home and drinking my wine. FML
Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML
Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML
Today, I came home to find my mom drunk. She asked me for a hug and then started crying, "Where's my daughter?" I'm her daughter. And her only child, as far as I know. FML
Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred, "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML
Today, my mom came home, shitfaced drunk. She thought I was my dad and gave me a forceful kiss, with a lot of tongue. She then pulled away, stared at me, screamed in horror, and spewed all over me. I puked too. FML
Today, I was watching a home video of when my mom was pregnant with me. She had a beer in her hand. FML
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Top comments
tigerthepredator 16
You need to have a serious talk with your mother when she's sober.
jake131000 21
Most of these fml's are funny... But this is just sad. I'm sorry for what your mom said. It doesn't make it any less true because she's drunk, she just doesn't care that she said it.
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Comments (76)
FemskyD 26
wauw thats pretty horrible.. i hope there was a sence of sarcasm involved there..
fakedsincerity 32
I'm pretty sure there wasn't any sarcasm. But even if there was, that's a really ****** up thing to joke about. Sorry OP, that's an awful thing to hear.
isuckwithnames 22
I agree with you on the sarcasm part, but some people are into black humor. In my family we joke about how my half-sister was, for lack of a better term, an accident, my brother was an if it happens it happens, and I was the actual planned one. There is no ill will, just jokes.
fakedsincerity 32
I think there's a huge difference between "haha you were an accident (but we still love you implied with the joking)" and "I wish you had died", but I 100% get your point.
tigerthepredator 16
You need to have a serious talk with your mother when she's sober.
Arwen_Evenstar 37
And not take care of her while she's drunk, she doesn't deserve it.
jake131000 21
Most of these fml's are funny... But this is just sad. I'm sorry for what your mom said. It doesn't make it any less true because she's drunk, she just doesn't care that she said it.
dafakeslimshady 12
who are you kidding this is still funny
WCARlover 35
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wow that is so sad. Maybe she meant it as in she wasn't prepared to have a child, not that it's any excuse at all
fuckfuckityfuck 16
That's ****** up on so many levels.
abbyade 21
That's so not right. I hope you are okay OP, maybe try talking to her when she's sober..so straighten things out.
ksks1234 33
It sounds like you are in an emotionally abusive relationship. I hope you find help.
Red_Curls1995 28
I agree with eight. Your relationship doesn't sound healthy.
Dale_shackleford 13
You're using the reasoning of an emotional hostage. Try to get help and get out of that situation. Also your boyfriend sounds like an alcoholic, as it seems like he drinks to escape his problems.
epicx22 22
Drunk or not, your boyfriend shouldn't talk to you like this. Also, apologizes do not fix everything. If this is a constant thing, I don't think you should be in that relationship.