Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after giving my husband a ton of crap about the speeding ticket he got last year, I got a speeding ticket. FML
Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML
Today, I got a ticket. From my dad the cop. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, I was on the way to traffic court for a $340 speeding ticket I'd got. My mother called me and I wasn't paying attention which caused me to speed. Right past a cop. When I told the cop where I was going, he started laughing at me. I now have another $300 ticket. FML
Today, I got a ticket. The officer's daughter is my ex. He gave me a ticket for 31 in a 30 mph zone. FML
Today, I was pulled over and was given a $300 ticket for going 90mph on a 70mph highway. The cop swore he saw my silver car darting in and out of traffic. A couple of minutes earlier that exact car had passed me while I was following the speed limit. FML
Today, a cop rear-ended me. Then I received a ticket from him for driving too far under the speed limit. We were in a school zone. FML
Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cigarette butt out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML
Today, I got a parking ticket for $150. It seems it was issued by my husband, who apparently can't remember license plate numbers. FML
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Top comments
Awahso 25
Your husband is an idiot. He deserves a ticket. It does suck that you have to pay for it though.
Goldenchest 14
What does 75 in your mom even mean..?
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Comments (205)
saidawhiting 14
Your husband sounds like a brat.
12addy3 2
I read this yesterday then was skimming through the other postings today and forgot half of this one but remembered it was funny so I read it out loud to my dad realizing after the fact that it had A "sex reference".
Jollyfrog 3
No relationship is going to be completely even in terms of fiscal burden and effort given. It's very juvenile to measure exactly who give what and judge who is 'freeloading' based up on this. By this definition one party in a relationship will always be freeloading, which is a little unhealthy. My thoughts; if the husband genuinely contributes nothing to the relationship, i.e. no job, no housework, no favours ect.. then yes, there is a problem here and if he really cares he would work to rectify it. however, if he simply earns less money, but does in fact has a job ect then he is not sponging, and by claiming that as primary bread winner, your partner is therefore freeloading i would say that you have a serious issue here. You should be happy that you are able to provide your partner with a better life with you than without. Not hold it over him in some sort of points winning contest. i would like to add that with the information provided i have no knowledge of OPs situation so the comments above are meant to be speculative, not personal.
Manbro 1
Although thats the funniest insult i've heard in years and it made me literrally laugh out loud, he should pay for the ticket not you.
LeHipster 0
you pay for his tickets? yeah fyl
JesMommy 11
The ticket is in his name, he's the idiot. Make him pay his own fine for being an ass hat...oh yeah, he's a freeloader...let his dumbass go to jail because he's stupid AND lazy! It will.be one less mouth to feed for a minute!
mymiles 13
Sounds like a keeper
Epickitty58 29
If he's your husband, isn't his money your money and vice versa, i.e. what's his is yours and what's yours is his?
kuraifenshi 18
I'm sorry for asking, but who goes 20 over the speed limit and uses the word "fuzzball", even when angry?
anonymoux_fml 11
You can't be ticketed for saying that...