Today, my girlfriend got paid by the richest guy in our school to go to the Winter Formal with him. She took up the offer. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my friend I would pay him to ask out the ugliest girl he knew. He asked out my girlfriend. FML
Today, after finally getting a date with the girl I like, she invited her new boyfriend along as well. I ended up paying for their first date. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in front of about 75 people in the fanciest restaurant in town. She told me she was already engaged, while holding up her right hand. FML
Today, I got invited to a big upperclassmen party that underclassmen don't normally get invited to. I was feeling really good when I got there and saw that the girl I'm in love with was there. They stole my pants and gave me a swirly. Her reaction was to post pictures on Facebook. FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad offered me $100 to break up with his daughter. I eagerly replied "No", but my girlfriend grabbed the money and said, "Deal." FML
Today, I paid for the girl I love to come to a music festival with me. Fifteen minutes after we got there, she was hanging off the arm of some muscly rich douche who barely glanced at me, except to call me "little simpy dude." She giggled as he whisked her off to the VIP area. FML
Today, the girl who'd asked me to prom told me she assumed we weren't going together and is now going with her friends. After agreeing to go with her, I'd bought a $200 non-refundable suit along with the ticket. I have no one else to go with. FML
Today, my crush from high school finally agreed to go out with me. While on the seemingly good date, she offered me a discount to her OnlyFans page. FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad offered me $100 to break up with his daughter. I eagerly replied "no", but my girlfriend grabbed the money and said, "deal." FML
Today, I went on a date. I took her out to an expensive steak house. When she was done eating, she got up, said she was married, and told me she only accepted the date because I'd be paying for it. FML
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Top comments
Akitakat 31
Be thankful you now know that your ex is basically a call girl. There is no trusting her.
pjsr 33
Ewwww! How repulsive is this guy that even as the richest guy in school, he still has to pay someone to go out with him?
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Comments (36)
Akitakat 31
Be thankful you now know that your ex is basically a call girl. There is no trusting her.
mt21mt 15
And I bet she will expect you to be happy when she buys you a little gift with part of the money.
Adam Dessouki 13
Over my many years of life experiences, I’ve learnt one lesson and I live by it. “Love is trash, bitches need cash” Now I’m never sad, and always got a $100 in dollar bills.
feckarsedrink 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
High school bullshit.. grow up and go to college idiot
jkjorn 18
Let me guess, the formal was at the Snowboard Academy?
ohsnapword 21
Did they do this on The Simpsons?
pjsr 33
Ewwww! How repulsive is this guy that even as the richest guy in school, he still has to pay someone to go out with him?
bartsj1988 7
Perhaps, its only OP's girlfriend that he wants to go to the dance with. He has to pay only because she isn't available.
esca6angel 16
Just to show that money can't buy a decent personality.
Captain_M 8
Ho Ho Ho, Merry Christmas..... Well, at least now you know.
Lobby_Bee 18
Every girl has a price. Every girl.
Allie614032 34
I was offered a million dollars to go on ten "dates" with some old guy. I said no. Not every girl has a price.
RichardPencil 32
A hundred million?
onceuponatime456 16
No you weren't!
ohsnapword 21
Wow, I'd pay a million for you to stay away from me.
Allie614032 34
@onceuponatime456 - Yeah. I was. He contacted me over Facebook. I ended up blocking him because he wouldn't stop messaging me, trying to convince me to say yes. @ohsnapword - I'll take you up on that offer. Feel free to DM me your bank info.
bartsj1988 7
I highly doubt that he had a million dollars to offer
PhantomCrevan 8
You do realize that if every woman has a price, so does every man? You literally could have just said "everyone has a price" and your comment would have had the same meaning *without* the casual sexism. Also, no, not everyone has a price, because there will always be someone that will choose their principles over the money, even if it's just to be contrary.
RichardPencil 32
Indecent Proposal. Be suspicious if she seems to have a lot more money than the agreed-upon payment.