Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Not cut out for this
Today, I took my girlfriend skydiving for her birthday. I insisted on joining her to make it a memory for us both, despite my fear of heights. I passed out twice mid-freefall and had to be saved by the instructor both times. FML
Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after we jumped, and only came to as we touched the ground. FML
Wahey!
Today, I went parasailing for the first time ever. My friends thought it would be funny to pull down my trunks right before my feet left the boat. I dangled there in the air for the whole resort to see. On top of that, I lost my shorts in the ocean. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML
Today, my best friend thought it would be funny push me off my bike. He thought it was even funnier when the paramedic accidentally dropped me. FML
Karma
Today, at school, I offered my friend $5 to climb up a tree and jump off. I was already having a hard day and just wanted a bit of a laugh. What I didn't expect was to end up in the hospital with a broken arm because my friend jumped on me. FML
Memorable challenge
Today, I challenged myself and went skydiving! However, I made the mistake of doing so on an empty stomach. I made it through the freefall, and through most of the canopy bit, until low-blood-sugar induced dizziness made me blackout on final approach. I still remember most of it, but now I feel emasculated. FML
Pirate move
Today, I was kayaking with my friend. We figured it'd be awesome if I jumped from my kayak straight into his. Sounded good in theory. One flipped kayak, a pair of lost glasses, and a humiliating swim back to shore later, I'm starting to think it wasn't the best idea. FML
Today, I was on a roller coaster and this 13 year old sitting next to me was completely terrified. To cheer him up, I threw my hands in the air. While my hands were up, we hit a curve and I elbowed him in the face, making him cry. FML
We meet again
Today, at the airport, I was waiting for my best friend who's been away for over a year. I spotted her, ran over, yelled her name, and jumped on her back. It wasn't her. It was a complete stranger who was somehow more terrified than I was embarrassed. FML
Top comments
gracehi 33
I can't believe you FELL for that one! *Ba dum tssss*
Mr_Relatable 16
Oh chute, he probably sent you're heartbeat sky high, and your stomach in a dive!
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Comments (118)
I_own_a_dog 11
Man all you butt hurt people? Lighten up and accept a cruel prank every once in awhile.. It was a prank and I'm sure a enjoyable experience.. Not like OP's friend killed his dog or something..
Solano2580 24
Yeah, crying and urinating because you are under the precedence that your mentally distressed friend was planning on killing both himself and you is soo enjoyable. -_-
dabaerju 23
I'm sure you'll reconsider when someone does that to you.
logicrules 11
I agree with you mate. All these overly sensitive people can't take a joke. It was a huge prank and something to laugh about once OP calms down. If everyone never trusted their friends again or stopped speaking to them after a prank then no wonder the world is going to shit.
smokecloud_ 37
Pranks are one thing. Pretending to kill yourself and the prankee is too ******* far. And I love me a good prank.
mezochan 29
That wasn't a prank. Pranks are fun and no one gets serious mental scars from them. Thinking you're going to die as you get pushed out of a plane isn't funny.
FieldLeftBlank 20
"An enjoyable experience", that's why it's on FML.
logicrules 11
If the person really was going to kill them self why would they do it when taking their mate for a tandem skydive? And also why would they cut the cord they just wouldn't open the chute in the first place? Yeh you would shit yourself at first but soon realise it was a joke. Just sound like a bunch of drama queens.
HylianTwilight 21
I had my ex-boyfriend 'prank' me by using my fears against me. Maybe I should have known better but for him to call and say I was in danger, then see a man rush me with a knife? Yeah, totally cool 'prank' that landed him on the floor with a punch to the balls and me even more paranoid about going by myself in the dark. Now I absolutely detest pranks because they're humiliating, and that my first time being pranked I was being laughed at for crying in fear. What should have been a once-in-a-lifetime thrill for the OP will just be remembered as a negative experience by his friend. You don't dramatically announce to your friend that you and he are both dying because he's suicidal and taking you with him as a 'prank'. I'd be cutting some other ties than those cords if that happened to me.
anonymuse_fml 31
#52 - do you remember that plane that crashed in the mountains in Europe a year or so ago? Killed over 100 people. It was a case of co-pilot suicide. The captain was locked out of the cockpit after using the bathroom and then the co-pilot purposefully crashed the plane killing everyone on board. And this isn't an unprecedented incident. So, for OP to believe someone would want to kill them self and bring them with, it isn't exactly a far stretch to believe it.
DoomedGemini 38
For some reason, it's not uncommon for people to kill others then themselves. Ever heard of someone killing their family then themselves? A shooter killing people before turning the gun on themselves?
logicrules 11
64 yeh I remember that. It's a bit different a bloke showing no signs of anything to suddenly kill everyone without warning compared to just before you go parachuting the friend screaming about it. I have a fear of spiders so what did my mates do when we went away? Put a spider in my bed. Did I scream and run out the room to them laughing yeh. Did I never speak to any of them again no I swore a lot then laughed it off then worked out how to get them back. For your bf to have a random bloke run at you with a knife then I would agree that's a dick move and something I wouldn't find that funny at all.
anonymuse_fml 31
#77 - there is a HUGE difference between. putting a spider in someone's bed and telling someone they cut parachute cords before pushing you out of an airplane.
logicrules 11
Clearly you've never had a camel spider in your bed. And I know I was just using it as an example of how pranks are the best when they're humiliating or play on your fears. Get op to do a follow up in a few weeks time I bet they're laughing about it. Even if they never go skydiving again.
MonstreBelle 29
77- Do you realize that causing someone to believe they are about to die can have serious physical and psychological consequences, including death? Would it still have been funny if OP had a fatal heart attack caused by the terror he was feeling? Would everyone who fails to find humor in making someone believe they are about to die still be butthurt people who can't take a joke? Will someone dying during one of these "pranks" finally be enough to convince you that endangering the lives of others isn't remotely funny? Grow the **** up.
DoomedGemini 38
Oh dear, a camel spider.. SOOO close to thinking you're going to die as you fall down. My mom has a phobia of spiders, I know how terrifying it is to her. It's a fear, but not like thinking you are going to DIE. And what if he believed his friend and didn't bother checking the parachute?! There's enough danger in sky diving itself without someone making you think you're about to die. And no, not every suicidal person tries to reach out and it's not uncommon for them to commit suicide and completely blindside someone. When you have depression, it's pretty common to learn to fake a smile and act like you're okay.
logicrules 11
I was taking the piss you silly twat. Learn what sarcasm is. I'm bored of this conversation now clearly it's something we'll always disagree on. You think it's life ending I think it's something to laugh about. I'm sure the world will keep spinning.
logicrules 11
96 I'm perfectly grown up thanks if your opinion counted for anything I still wouldn't be bothered what you think. Get off your high ******* horse and stop thinking the worst of everything you stuck up ****
anonymuse_fml 31
#95 - considering that the camel spider is 1) not, technically speaking, truly a spider nor 2) poisonous in any way, you can't compare it AT ALL to what happened to OP. If you had said it was a brown recluse or a black widow, it might possibly have a tiny means of comparison, but considering bites from the two are rarely fatal while falling several thousand feet from an airplane without a parachute usually is, you are reaching even with those two spiders as examples.
MonstreBelle 29
100- Lol okay, if you say so. Clearly your response proves you're quite the paradigm of maturity. Have a nice day!
logicrules 11
100 you know nothing about me to even question my maturity. And like I said your opinion means nothing to me. 95 apologies for calling it a spider when technically it's not but as I don't know the correct terminology I used the easiest one, but if I said black widow or brown recluse I would have been lying as I have encountered neither. I know falling to your death from 14000ft is completely different to being bitten by a spider I was merely using it as an example of whilst pranks can be designed to humiliate and scare you it doesn't mean you should never speak to people again over it. If I was in the situation as OP I would have shit myself, probably twatted my mate, then laughed about it over a pint in the evening. If that means I get people hating on me then so be it I honestly couldn't care less and it has no impact on my outlook in life.
amourmourant 18
Dude. OP thought he was going to die - this was probably his first time doing something like that, and his "friend" ruined it. Completely ruined it. His friend trusted him to be his guide and he didn't do that. I wouldn't be surprised if there is some kind of criminal that could come out of this. It's borderline attempted murder. You may have been fine with it but 98% of people would NOT have been. It's not funny, it's not okay. that's NOT okay. No matter what you believe.
Rababco 29
Plus, even though it's a prank, it's probably possible to get PTSD from something that traumatic. OP still thought he was going to die and that experience and that fear could still stick with him for a long time.
Dave_Davington 34
Wow, that is impressive, to put it mildly. You're going to have a hell of a time topping that one.
Lalala579121 28
"Me being your friend was just a prank." Topped.
Dave_Davington 34
That's not topping it, that's just being butthurt.
Matttis 7
Crap, someone already made a Sam Pepper joke...
alainopotato 20
Let the games begin. But seriously that is so uncool. Maybe he's not much of a friend after all.
sanchitgoyal 27
This could have gone wrong. In nervousness and fear you could have reacted differently leading to risk of life for both. not a smart thing to do by your friend!
grogers311 20
It was! Awesome!
VGaray 11
That's a little too intense for a prank.
Red_Curls1995 28
Get rid of him he seems unstable. No normal person would think that's an okay prank.
rldostie 19
Yes, this is a cruel prank and you have every right to be angry. But also, it's funny as hell.
lurker_no_more 13
agreed!
erptwerp 26
If you are falling bitch I kinda understand now why you pissed your pants. But both pants and friends are changeable.