Today, my five-year-old daughters realized that if one of them rang the doorbell, it would keep me distracted long enough for the other one to steal cookies from the kitchen. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized that my five-year-old daughters are deranged psychopaths, when one of them started screaming to get my attention while the other pulled the car door shut on my fingers. FML
Today, two children decided it would be fun to try to ding-dong-ditch me. I never answered the door as I saw them running away. They did it a couple of times before getting bored. That's when they decided it would be fun to come into my house instead. FML
Today, my 4-year-old twin sons discovered how to lock doors. They locked me out of the house while I was taking out the trash. I had to climb through the kitchen window, which they'd generously smeared with peanut butter. FML
Today, I asked my 7-year-old daughter what job she would like to have when she grows up. She calmly replied that she wouldn't have one; she'd just bring her husband round to my place and steal food from me. FML
Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML
Today, I discovered that when business is slow at my family-owned store, my daughter and another employee make a habit of sneaking away to the back room. I have literally been paying this kid to screw around with my daughter. FML
Today, I needed to grab something from the garage. As soon as the door closed, I heard a little click sound. My one-year-old seems to have figured out the door lock. FML
Today, I was babysitting for my neighbors. Their 5 year-old had finally fallen asleep at 11 after two hours of stories and songs. No sooner had I tiptoed out of the room did I realize that my phone had dropped out of my pocket onto the bed. It was ringing. It was their mother checking in. FML
Today, management told me that I couldn't have a doorbell on my door. How did they get my attention to tell me this? By ringing my doorbell. FML
Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML
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Top comments
BellaBear90 27
Smart cookies :)
pam241 15
Genius kids you got there
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Comments (147)
thick_lesbo 8
I love it!! These are the things parenthood are made of!! They will stop as soon as it stops working...ie u stop going to the door lol... But I hope u enjoy the moment
NUMANUMAMAN 5
gta 5 cookie heist
sarcasticlover 30
smart girls you got there!better watch out
SuperMew 22
At least your children are smart enough to know how to work the system.
cha2010chi 10
bright side, teamwork
ChloeKissyface44 9
How did a five year old get outside to ring the doorbell?
skyeyez9 25
Open the door, reach out, press doorbell and go back inside. It isnt difficult, and if the mom is on the second floor, she wont hear the door open and shut if the kids are quiet enough.
MasqueradePrince 25
A kitchen on the second floor?
monnanon 14
its possible. i lived in a house that had bedrooms downstairs and the living room upstairs. the kitchen coukd concievably be upstairs too in some arrrangements.
skyeyez9 25
You dont even need to step foot outside to ring a doorbell. The doorbell is almost always located within arms reach.
Goblin182 27
If Mom's on the second floor why would they need to distract her with the doorbell?
ChloeKissyface44 9
If a five year old child is unsupervised and able to open the front door they can't exactly be trusted to only reach out and ring the door bell. They are not old enough to go outside alone.
TrueColours 9
At least they're using initiative and co-operating with one another. It's better than having them fight.
s_h_a_y_l_y_n_n 5
Hey, you got smart kids, I would be proud. Lol
tulha 12
Future evil masterminds you got there OP! :D
buttcramp 21
yes this sucked.. but your kids sound like a blaaaast! hahahaha and rock on with your parenting.