Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
Today, my 3-year-old girl accidentally caught sight of me stepping out of the shower. Now she thinks "daddy has a tail" and she just has to let everyone know about it. FML
Today, as I got out of the shower, my young stepson saw me naked. Later, he asked his mom why my "pee pee" is so small when everyone says it is supposed to get bigger when you become an adult. FML
Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML
Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
Today, my 5 year-old daughter watched me getting dressed in the bathroom and asked, "Mum, when my boobs grow, will they droop like yours?" FML
Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML
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Top comments
Crickmasta 0
I don't know what's worse; the fact that your penis is the same size as a seven year old's or that your daughter already saw a boy's penis at the age of seven, all i know is FYL
EmbalmingTheatre 0
That sucks, but maybe this boy has a really huge one and it's not so bad? And first, wow
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Comments (232)
EmbalmingTheatre 0
That sucks, but maybe this boy has a really huge one and it's not so bad? And first, wow
lezzyluver 0
maybe the op was eating a banana in the shower and so was dylan jeeze
theice 0
f your life for having a small dick an ydi for not locking your bathroom door when you have a 7 year old that looks at dicks. pedofile
alien491 0
yeah right a 7 year old would have a fully developet penis.
andycakes 0
maybe she meant bellybutton?
Brendan3693 0
he's not a pedophile if it was an accident
LoadFasterPage 0
hey hey Dylan had a boner dw ( I'm a liar)
Vociferouslife 4
This is wrong on so many levels. First thing's first: maybe you shouldnt let your daughter get too used to seeing those..
_Schnitzel_ 4
Doesn't mean he's a pedo you idiot, his kids are seven and they can change clothes together if they share a room, and she would think of it as bad either. She also barged in and it wasn't his fault she saw
Crickmasta 0
I don't know what's worse; the fact that your penis is the same size as a seven year old's or that your daughter already saw a boy's penis at the age of seven, all i know is FYL
kindofgocrazy 0
You show me yours, I'll show you mine.
omgmorganomg 0
what movie? wasn't that from a movie?
cherrypieguy 0
Harry potter 4
slushpup9696 12
seriously?!?? what's the other dialougue?
Yorih 19
moody (crouch jr.) and snap are talking about their dark marks I think. or moody shows his dark Mark and Harry shows the cut on his arm. but it's right at the end of the film I think. I know, I'm sad XD
brenkite 5
I'm going to the last one as hargred
A7X_LoVeee 10
Hagrid?
BigLord 0
... maybe she saw the kid's penis while erected and yours soft, and therefore they are the same size? Still, kinda spooky to think that she saw a kid's penis. Erect.
jhumphr 0
are you high? a 7 year old cantget a boner
imcannedfruit 0
Yes they can. Boys can get random erections from birth.
Brendan3693 0
your username is imcannedfruit.
shibainu519 0
jhumphr is a moron.
Somefruits 24
@ 178 and 179, guys can get boners even before they're born!
EmbalmingTheatre 0
And agree with #2 also, that's really disturbing too. You should probably worry about that more than about your own penis size
Tehalon 0
#3, a 7 year old erect penis? I don't wanna know what you all did at that age, but i'm assuming all other 7 year olds don't do em. FYL for having a micro-penis, and i dont think there is much to worry about with your 7 year old seeing other 7 year old's genitals. When i was that age we had gym at school and you changed together and showered together.. you don't have sexual urges at that age so whats the problem.
junkinmahcranium 0
What the hell kind of school did #5 go to? That's disgusting. Kids shouldn't even be exposed to that kind of stuff. Plus, I'm sure the kids weren't comfortable doing that. Just .. ew.
junkinmahcranium 0
What the hell kind of school did #5 go to? That's disgusting. Kids shouldn't even be exposed to that kind of stuff. Plus, I'm sure the kids weren't comfortable doing that. Just .. ew.
unluckyduckyz 0
you can't help it. you get random erections at all ages
JordynBMTH 0
I love how you say that when your dp is a picture of a kid drinking from a wine bottle..
minichamp116 8
Girls and Boys changed in the same room, in elementary school? WTF?!?!?!?!?
jinx1995 12
at my primary/elementary school all the kids got changed into their p.e kit in the same room
KenMcGormick 0
Dylan is a keeper
ijrnelson 0
#6 ah ha ha! But seriously that's a FYL on many many levels!
Rellikiox 0
You should talk to her
SmoothTalker 0
lol ditto #7...oh wow is this ****** up on so many levels...
Sofa_King 0
Perhaps she meant another Dylan...?