dominator152
United States
Today, my dad decided that my diploma makes a good pen-tester. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Abington, United States
Today, my father used my birth certificate as a beer coaster. Accident or not, it pretty much perfectly sums up our relationship. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I borrowed my dad's laptop to type an essay. While I was saving it, I noticed some curious looking files and I opened them. They were rejection letters from all the colleges I had applied to. My dad had been forging them so he wouldn't have to pay for my tuition bills. FML
seriously?
Manassas, United States
Today, I discovered that my dad still doesn't consider my career as an app developer a "real job". FML
Anonymous
Germany
Today, I failed to get my driver's licence. My father was the instructor. FML
art_major
United Kingdom
Today, my dad came to my graduate art show wearing a t-shirt saying "My other daughter is a science major". He'd had it specially made. FML
mathgenius
Kolltveit, Norway
Today, I passed my math test with flying colors. My dad thought I had cheated, so he emailed the school and told them that I had. They lowered my grade. FML
collegestudent
Alexa, play "What's My Age Again?" by Blink182
Today, my dad asked me if I needed crayons for school. I'm going to college this fall. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML
PerpetuallyHappy
Rochester, United States
Today, I got sent to the principal's office because my Dad decided that instead of signing his name, he would sign, "Ms. Bigtits", because he wanted to make sure the teachers were paying attention to what their students handed in. FML
thebeachisthatway
Worcester, United States
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
Top comments
mixxanber 0
did his pens work?
JesseJaymz 0
decide his face makes a good pin cushion
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Comments (296)
lonesomeXheartbr 0
it's just a diploma. it's hot; I can't sleep ):
jizzmode 0
awh you don't need a silly diploma. all you need is weed
Trickyklown 0
You know you can put your weed in a diploma? Just sayin'.
jizzmode 0
honestly I know nothing about weed, so no. how is that possible?
boredatwork11 2
this thread, major win!!!
Trickyklown 0
Well you see what you do is you put tiny traces of weed onto it, or just roll the weed up in it. My alcoholic dad taught me how to do it when I graduated preschool.
jizzmode 0
oh my. that's genius. what did he teach you after middle school?
Trickyklown 0
After middlescho he kicked me out so now I live with a troll in a cave and all he says is fàlso y madicon!! omg it sucks!! D: But I did learn from experiance that you can put tour weed ANYWHERE!!
Trickyklown 0
*middleschool *your
jizzmode 0
Awesome! :D Thank you for enlightening me.
Trickyklown 0
You're very welcome!! You look absolutely gorgeous in that pic.
jizzmode 0
Why thank you! You're extremely fetching as well. :)
Trickyklown 0
~takes a bow~ Why thank you, kind lass. :D
jizzmode 0
Of course, nobleman. ;D Haha the only reason I'm talking like this is because we're reading Shakespeare in class
Trickyklown 0
Lol yay Shakespeare!! What play are you guys reading? I love Macbeth!!
jizzmode 0
Romeo & Juliet :) Our teacher is making us watch the Leonardo DiCaprio version haaa
LexaDear 0
we watched it in our class, loved it.
Trickyklown 0
That is a pretty good remake lol. The actor that plays marcucio(sp?) is pretty hilarious! He is also my favorite character is Romeo and Juliet.
jizzmode 0
It's so funny! Mercutio is pretty bomb, kinnnna sucks that the whole black guy dies first thing happens haha. I
Trickyklown 0
Lol yeah black people are death prone in movies. It is pretty sad! And it sucks how Marcucio dies D:.
jizzmode 0
I know right :/ He's in a good place though. :D I want to read Hamlet!
Trickyklown 0
Lol yes a much better place! I've never read Hamlet lol I heard it was pretty good.
MetalmaidenDeth 0
God i hated reading that play and watching the leonardo one. the movie didnt fit the way it was intended by shakespeare and it was all weird for me. that's just my opinion though.
Trickyklown 0
Well your opinion sucks!!! jk I didn't think that play was that bad, the remake was pretty good. Maybe you don't like Shakespeare that much? I wish I can talk like spakespearing times xD.
jizzmode 0
The only thing I really like is the writing style. The story itself pisses me off cause it's a bunch of dead people x( And Romeo is a fruit...
MetalmaidenDeth 0
no i ******* hate shakespeare.
Trickyklown 0
Maybe you should read Macbeth xD there is tons more people that die! And I would kill to have a gf that spoke like that! That would be pretty sexy IMHO!
Trickyklown 0
~pats #225's back~ It is ok to each his own. I find Shakespeare's work alil repetitive at times lol. He was obessed with people dying that sick bastard!
jizzmode 0
Haha I'll not knot thou mind with speech of speeches' bane. ;D
jizzmode 0
I'm sure Shakespeare hopped on the crack e'ery now & then
Trickyklown 0
Lol even though I didn't know what you meant that was pretty sexy! But now I bid thy farewell! And good morrow! I shall cone back in a fortnight! And other crazy medieval time sayings!
jizzmode 0
Peace out muthafucka. :D
calovembs 4
Leonardo Dicaprio is a sexy man
lovely_asian 0
twelfth night is a pretty good play by Shakespeare!! :)
Princess_Zelda 0
you should've framed it or something.
cmac86 24
first thing I did when I got mine was go frame it. ydi for leaving it around.
sisteresss 12
awwie that sucks!!!!!
superbadd 0
awww cute pic :D
vickybaby_fml 0
I would have punched him in the eye lol
NuMuzik 0
wipe his ass. test ur fist on his face.
carriedaway02 0
lol! that's kinda sad, but if it was your college diploma now THERE'S an FML
morganavery33 5
aw, poor you.
tyler3 0
cute
gusgus36 5
it's prolly just a high school diploma.. big deal.. mine is still like sitting in a drawer.. who cares.. but I guess the FML is that the dad thinks so little of the diploma, not just the actual pen marks