Today, my dad came home from a trip to Arizona and brought back special hand-picked gifts for the whole family. When he got to me, he smiled, and pulled out a free lotion from the hotel at which he was staying. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I received from my husband for Christmas the body lotion that only he uses. And nothing else. FML
Today, I finally got a Christmas gift, a calligraphy set, for my father that I have been looking for for a month. My dad came home happily with the same calligraphy set today, saying that he surprised himself for Christmas. He got it cheaper than me. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a gift. A half-used bottle of body lotion that belonged to his dead wife. FML
Today, my mom went to the store. She said she was feeling generous, and had gotten everyone a little treat. My brothers each got candy and a movie. I got acne medication. FML
Today, my dad told me he had a present for me. It was his tooth, which he had pulled out a few minutes before. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML
Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML
Today, my dad decided to shave his beard. I told him I wanted him to keep it, so he took the shavings, put them in a jar, and left it in my room. FML
Today, my dad and stepmom came back from a very expensive two-month trip across the world. When they got home, they had more gifts for their cat than for me. FML
Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML
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Top comments
golden_warrior 23
someone is not getting a gift on Father's Day
flashback.miss 28
My dad had an awesome time in Arizona and all I got was this lousy lotion. When his birthday rolls around, be sure to return the favour.
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Comments (77)
TecheyTim 14
My response...."smooth dad, REAL smooth".
fluffycatsdad 33
What. A. Tool.
beavecoon 4
at least your skin will be nice and moist
alkolaali 7
I say you put that lotion to work. Lols
RKD 23
Douche move by Dad! He probably forgot and just wanted to give you something so he wouldn't look like a TOTAL douche (which he does), maybe he feels guilty and will make it up to you! That sucks, FYL though!
iamthunder 4
Guess who's daddy's favorite?
Annayers 9
Get him some lotion for Fathers' Day :)
Carlie_McCartney 1
My favourite is the lotion from the Grand Canyon!!
elenaunlucky 10
be happy mate! my dad gifts me toothpicks and mint from cheap domestic flights started since i was 5 and is goin on till m 20 and expects me to hug him and give him the greatest thank you speech.
lameuser 23
Now you won't be ashy.