Today, my cousin started sending sarcastic love messages to me. I replied, with even cheesier lines. Then she rang me saying she was so glad I felt the same way. Turns out she wasn't being sarcastic. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a mass message on WhatsApp from my extended family about my cousin’s engagement. Trying to be funny, I replied, “Wow, can’t wait to see how long this one lasts.” I thought I was sending it to my brother. Only my brother. I sent it to the whole family group. Including my cousin. And her fiancé. FML
Today, I received a friend request on Facebook. I didn't know her, but she was cute, so I accepted the request. After looking at her pictures, I sent her a message saying "What's up cutie, do I know you?". She responded "Yes, I'm your cousin". FML
Today, I woke up in a good mood, and I excitedly shared with my mom that I was in a "wonderful mood." Her response was to yell at me because she’s "had it with my fucking sarcasm." She refuses to believe I wasn’t being sarcastic. Day ruined. FML
Today, I got a text from a cousin thanking me for always being nice to her. Bear in mind that this “cousin” basically bullied me as a child, all while I looked up to her. She’s gone through a very rough time recently, so I thought she'd sent me someone else’s text by mistake and I told her so. She replied, “No.” FML
Today, I sent a group text round to my friends asking if they wanted to hang out sometime. One of my friends thought this was aimed directly at her and confessed her love for me. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what she loves the most about me. She said it's the fact that I look like her cousin. FML
Today, I sent a love letter I'd written meant for my crush to a friend so she could evaluate my prose before I actually sent it to him. For some reason, my emotions got the best of me, and I mistakenly CC'd my mom. She replied with three crying-with-laughter emojis. FML
Today, I sent a romantic, flirty text to my boyfriend. A few minutes later, I got a reply from… my mom, saying, “I don’t think this was meant for me, but thanks for making my day awkward.” FML
Today, I saw an adorable girl at the bar and I went to talk to her. I decided to use my cheesiest pick up line to make her laugh. After I said it, she knew who I was. It was my cousin I hadn't seen in 8 years. FML
Today, I told my cousin that I would gladly help him get through the loss of my aunt. That is until he started flirting with me. FML
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Top comments
saba_ajira 29
Oh damn... Time to explain some things OP
thisiswilli_fml 5
Sounds like you guys will have an awkward moment during Christmas parties this year.
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Comments (90)
justanthrnoob 1
Nothing wrong with that if she's hot.
BeepBeepSwerve 9
oh but if shes not hot then its wrong right? you're pathetic
MzZombicidal 36
You're disgusting.
vikky538 29
it happens...
irokmiles 4
Oh my
worldclassrager 41
Well that's one way to break up...hope you can maybe get things straightened out or find someone else...
MzZombicidal 36
I don't think they have to after that, #75. :P
xxVampiresRulexx 14
That's actually kinda gross....
swearinta 6
Are you from the south? I guess it's normal in remote places down there
tj4234 36
No they are from the UK. Weirdly enough though, this isn't legally considered incest over here. (unless they are double cousins) It's probably just a phase she will get over though OP. GSA is more common than people would like to think, but in the majority of cases people get over it quickly.
soulstrike23 6
Is she hot?
nm_98 3
Oh god
loserman67 36
First cousin = stay away Second or third cousin = **** their brains out Nothing like keeping it in the family
magaoitin 4
They go for that down in Norfolk, you might have to move. "But I say go for it! Sex between cousins, your offspring is the closest we are ever going to get to a superhero"