Today, my boyfriend, who lives 100 miles away and whom I haven't seen in 2 months, told me he was visiting my city with some friends. I assumed this was an opening to an invitation, but no, he just asked me about the best places to get drunk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my long-distance boyfriend was at my house for a 10-day visit. He told me that we'd never spent so much time together, so he didn't know me well and now, he'd finally met the "real me". He doesn't like it. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend to tell him how excited I was to drive 12 hours to see him and his new house. His girlfriend answered. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend to see if he wanted to come over to my house. He said he couldn't because he was out of town. That would have be perfectly acceptable, if I hadn't called him on his house phone. FML
Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML
Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend asked if he could come over and hang out. He only came because he ran out of food at his house. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend of 2 years on a family vacation to meet my family for the first time. We all got really drunk and he made out with my dad. This was day one and we don't fly back for another 16 days. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to visit me at work. With another girl. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me as I was getting ready for bed and asked me to pick him up from the bar. Being a loving girlfriend I drive the 45 minutes; when I get there his friend informs me he left about 45 minutes ago. FML
Today, I spent 12 hours in an airport rather than go back to the apartment of the man I traveled to see for the weekend. Instead of wine, dine, sixty-nine, he took me to a tailgating event and introduced me to two girls he had a threesome with. FML
Today, my boyfriend took a day off from work because he felt "sick". I thought he might come see me since he hadn't come over in a while. Nope, he went to hang out with his ex instead. FML
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Top comments
Desfar 5
Give him the addresses to all the most popular gay strip bars. That should make his night.
ebonyirony 29
I'm sure he really does care about you. He just has to be drunk first.
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Comments (125)
Mrbedrockk 0
Dump him fast!
xmaximusx 12
Lol hes got hoes....... in different area codes
infectedsense 15
That's unhealthy, you resent her and eventually you'll cheat, so just dump her now.
SouthernGrl94 14
give him the address to a couple gay bars. go there, video him, break up with him and when people ask why you broke up, post it on facebook with the title of this is why boyfriend and i broke up!
SexyMexi21 23
Really? your going out with someone who loves farther than San Francisco is too me and you haven't seen him in 2 months? you had that coming to you.
blahblah5743794 19
I don't think he's your boyfriend then, sweetie. At least not a good one