grizzlybear
Mexico 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend told me that if I had a penis, our relationship would be better. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
CALIdime_15
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I watched my boyfriend have a full on conversation with his penis. He also talks to his penis nicer than he talks to me. FML
John Doe
🌶️ Spicy
Shaving!
Today, my girlfriend told me that if I shaved, my penis might seem bigger. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend told me the reason he can't keep an erection while we have sex is that I'm not attractive enough. FML
anon.
United States
Today, I found out if I refuse my boyfriend anything in public, he will continually yell out, "Penis!" until he gets his way. FML
Anonymous
San Francisco, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Bored
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
Ananimus
Peekskill, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I overheard my boyfriend of two years saying he only dates me because "sometimes jerking off just ain't good enough". FML
Munkeh
Birmingham, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Faithful
Today, I found out that my partner thinks love is more meaningful than sex, so it's okay to stick his penis in someone else. FML
Anonymous
Oakville, Canada
Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML
here's a giant baby
🌶️ Spicy
Confusing
Today, my boyfriend told me he was horny. Since it has been a while, I offered to help. He sighed and complained that he didn't feel attractive and didn't want sex. I laughed and asked if he grew a vagina overnight. He got mad and stomped off. FML
Top comments
Hillaryy789 9
You deserve it for not having a penis.
chickunkey 0
Your boyfriend wants to have a sword fight.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (173)
TheNewGuy03 29
here we have exhibit a, the "unintentional ****." |the kid|
MagicMarker 0
So basically, either a) your boyfriend is gay, or b) he's a misogynistic asshole. ("I'm not emotionally mature enough to try to understand what my girlfriend is thinking, so instead I'll just tell her that she would be Better If She Were A Man!") Either way, that's grounds for an instant dumping.
TheresNoEffingwa 7
if you wanna make him happy you gotta be like," Not gonna get you a diamond ring That sort of gift don't mean anything Not gonna get you a fancy car boy,ya gotta know you're my shinin' star Not gonna get you a house in the hills A man like you needs somethin' real Wanna get you somethin' from the heart Somethin' special boy It's a dick in a box a dick in a box babe It's a dick in a box Ooh, a dick in a box boy" ...jus sayin
martyslurpee18 0
he's gay?
hateevryone 15
why the hell is he with you, if he's gay?
supamanst 0
break up with him before he cheats on you with a dude!!
sk8terman 0
My boyfriend has a penis, and he's right, your relationship would be better!
mfelax9556 8
in a gay way? or in a "stop you r bitching and grow a pair" way?
illneedasaviour 0
this reminds me of that Friends episode where Ross finally realizes his (ex)wife is gay after having a threesome with another woman and becomes left out.
HansHansen 8
Of course it would be better - everything is better with one.