Today, my boyfriend's father suggested that, ideally, I should aim to have my baby in early July, or wait until he gets back from Europe in October. I'm due September 4th, and he will be "incredibly disappointed" if he misses the birth of his first grandchild due to my "selfishness". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother-in-law told me to "just wait" until she gets home from her trip, because apparently, taking a vacation with her partner is more important than the birth of her first grandchild. Contractions started a few hours ago. Part of me hopes she misses it. FML
Today, the father of my unborn child told me he isn't sure he'll be able to make it to the birth, since there's no guarantee of when it will happen, so he can't schedule time off. This would be understandable if he actually had a job. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to be in the room whilst I gave birth. He offered to wait in the waiting room, but only if I gave birth on a weekend, and if it was a weekday he’d be too busy at work. I reproduced with this guy, and this isn’t the meanest thing he’s ever said to me. FML
Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My boyfriend and I have been dying to have kids together. This would be an exciting moment if he wasn't deploying in June and will miss everything except the morning sickness. FML
Today, I should be spending my birthday with my boyfriend of 8 months. Instead he's visiting his ex, who's pregnant with a baby that "may or may not be" his. FML
Today, the soon-to-be father of my baby told me he thinks I'm an extremely selfish person, and that I don't love him. His reasoning? I haven't given him a back rub in two weeks, sleep too much, and have a hormonal problem. Once again: I AM PREGNANT! FML
Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML
Today, my future sister-in-law, who hasn’t even been engaged a week, informed everyone that the wedding is on December 19th, which is the due date of my first child. My brother won’t change the date and is making my family choose between his wedding or being at the hospital with me. FML
Today, after telling me his other girlfriend is pregnant, my boyfriend said we should stay together so I could help out with the baby. FML
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Top comments
kooochris1995 14
Jeez don't be so selfish!!! Women these days!!
perdix 31
Tell him you're disappointed that his gigolo son still hasn't popped the question even after knocking you up. I'll bet the old bastard will stop taking his petty annoyances to you anymore.
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Comments (220)
isis_morrigan 18
What a jerkwad! He can change his plans if he wants to be there! If not, even better! **** him!
daizttgg 9
Tell him god didn't plan it tht way
Akharr01 5
Do a renactment!
FML6565 4
Tell him to come back from his trip a month earlier if he whats to see the birth of his first grandchild !!
footballover 5
Has he always had a habit of talking to himself in the mirror? If so there's people you can call for that. But he's the selfish one OP, off in Europe lol
Gandretti 0
Haha this really made my day, really funny haha..
alfred07 18
He wants you see if you can get your baby to be born 2 months prematurely and you're selfish?
iloveweed69 7
He's the one who selfish, you are the one who has to give birth
ankoku 2
When he gets back tell him you just had it. He seems bright enough to believe it.
bubo_fml 11
Here's what you do...Birth the lil' bas..I mean child...as planned. Then, when the Father comes home, grease the kid up & hide him in a tire inner tube under your shirt. Go to hospital & put on a charade of going into labor & have your child be "born again," so to speak...Everyone wins!