cockalicious
Today, my boyfriend let me know he wanted me to leave by repeatedly jabbing me with my car keys. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
nokeys
United States
Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend after driving 200 miles to see him. While arguing, I told him I never wanted to see him again and left after slamming the front door. I left my car keys in his kitchen. FML
iJuli
Billings, United States
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be a good idea to break up with me in his car. I had to walk home. FML
Anonymous
United States
Get out
Today, my boyfriend tried to break up with me again, and actually offered me gas money so that I would leave. FML
rplovez
Canada
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML
Anonymous
Switch 2: Electric Boogaloo
Today, I found my boyfriend playing games when we have 5 million things to do, but the bastard picked me up, put me in the hall, shut the door in my face, and barricaded it with the sofa. I texted him, threatening to break up unless he opened the door; he texted back to leave my key behind when I left. FML
lug_nut
United States
Wrong place, wrong time
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML
strwbrry
United States
Today, I came home early, and my boyfriend's car was in my driveway. Inside, he was talking to my parents. He walked right past me and left. My mother then says, "He wanted me to tell you it's over." FML
dream_girl_3
United States
Enabling
Today, I let my boyfriend drive my car, knowing that he doesn't have a license. While he was out, he ran a stop sign, collided with another vehicle, and then left the scene of the accident. Then he lied to me about how the accident happened so I "wouldn't be so upset." FML
stuck
Hägersten, Sweden
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He decided to lock me in the apartment until I say that we are in fact still together. This is the 4th time he has done this. FML
Mel Hahn
Today, I walked out of my boyfriend's house to see my car window smashed in and my steering wheel cover stolen. I was only staying at his place because there had been a rash of vehicle break-ins in my neighborhood. FML
Top comments
tuppencej777 0
Learn how to take a hint!
IGotServedcouk 0
Yeah, you're skipping part of the story, such as he was messing around or he really needed to be somewhere and you were stalling, or there really should be an "ex" before the "boyfriend". Which is it? Are you a drama queen or a prat? =P
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Comments (52)
tuppencej777 0
Learn how to take a hint!
matrixchild 2
yeah, after sex you need to gtfo
Autoshot 9
Stubborn bitch.
Hanimon 0
You must be a lonely guy, #8
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Killer pic matrixchild.
MuchDance90s 0
have a hard time believing #8 has sex. unless his partners are necrophiliacs (sex w skeletons lmao)
skitzofreniks 5
#29, that would actually make #8 the necrophiliac, not his dead partners.
howler2345 0
yeah, just cause you're in a relationship doesn't mean that he wants you to hang out with him all the time lol. If that's not the case, then you're just going out with a dick. Either way, YDI
ahole123 0
cockalicious?
chrstygrl06 10
What a loser.. Break up with him and find yourself a man!
marmlr339 14
agreed. what a loser
Emrysa 1
I'm going to guess she's the crazy psycho loser if that's what it took to get her to leave. I think the first time someone jabbed me with their keys, a normal reaction would be you're an ass, bye.
rallets 23
^ *jab jab jab*
SummerRuby 1
Really? Your first reaction wouldn't be to tell them to stop jabbing you with their keys? Wow, you must have no sense of humor or fun, then, do you?
ptbft 1
I think you are missing the point, he was jabbing her with HER keys. How could she leave if he had her keys.
Awahso 25
Did you jab him back? xP
techweed 12
kick his ass .... oh I forgot ur a woman. crap, this will get me into so much shit with the feminists. JK
DjeePee 25
Technically, it aren't the feminists who are going to get you in so much shit. On the contrary. You know, they are the ones who think that men are equal to women, so if a man may kick someones ass, a woman may also. Op you're boring. Quit it.
Autoshot 9
17 - Your grammar is awful. Yuck.
Zebidee 9
#23 - English isn't her first language. Cut her some slack.
USAF_girl 3
I'm a woman and i would have stabbed him between the ribs with his own key! :-)
techweed 12
relax guys I was just kidding, though you might assume otherwise cause I'm Saudi Arabian, I'm actually not sexist at all I was just curious what sort of comments I'll get
hibiscushunylh 0
when you use phrases like " it aren't the feminists" using phrases like don't "on the contrary" doesn't make you any smarter.
Ranimal 12
Cockalicious.... Really? Omg, your bf wanted to leave! It's the end of your life! Ruined!
MassEffectNerd 0
at least he wasn't screaming and whining like a spoiled five year old.
jacob4848 4
Not his fault that you smell funny.
srgsk9 9
You probably deserved to be jabbed. You most likely ignored previous hints.
toooldforthis 19
maybe next time he'll just say "my other girlfriend will be here in ten mins so get the f*** out"
CrazyGirl445 4
am I the only one who doesn't see the ex before boyfriend? shouldn't there be one?
toooldforthis 19
there should be but there isn't, I'm thinking op enjoys key jabbing so much she'd like to stick around for round two
DjeePee 25
I hope you are the only one who wants to destroy a relationship because of a shitty reason like this.
Zebidee 9
DjeePee - I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking that. Who the hell would break up with someone over something so simple? This is another FML where I just thought 'so?'
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
Congrats 12, you're living up to your own username.
IGotServedcouk 0
Yeah, you're skipping part of the story, such as he was messing around or he really needed to be somewhere and you were stalling, or there really should be an "ex" before the "boyfriend". Which is it? Are you a drama queen or a prat? =P