Today, my boyfriend got a new job. He'll be over the road for three weeks at a time, and home on the remaining week. Basically, I'll see him once a month. Guess which time of month it'll fall on. FML
Itstrickyyxx
Erie, United States
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Top comments
BubbleGrunge 18
Hope your boyfriend isn't afraid to sail the red seas...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Bloody hell. Talk about horrible biological timing.
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Comments (295)
allthatandmore 0
Good luck with that...
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
Hey, sexy time isn't impossible on that time of the month. Work with what you've got!
shift_love 13
#3 exactly what I was gonna say. Just do it in the shower. It'll wash off lol.
xleanne_aLly 23
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH DHEHWWBHW
nabee26 15
Yea I agree. I mean what the hell right! If you love each other, then it shouldn't be a big issue. I say do it. The extra "lubrication" may feel nice. Lol
nateborg13 9
Looks like he's getting head all week.
kmaeh 8
Just skip your period! If you are on the birth control pill, instead of taking the placebos when your period is due, just start taking the next pack like normal. It's very handy for special occasions or trips, or when schedules collide ;)
Sawarski 13
Time for OPs boyfriend to be like Moses and part the Red Sea.
doctorhook86 25
This is only a problem if the OP and her bf are prudes. 67: As a doctor, I'm not convinced that's safe advice. But I also can't prove it isn't. ...Just be careful and talk to your own doctor.
Jessj958 19
I was recently told by my DR that I could skip my period by starting a new pack of pills instead of taking a week off. Easy way to fix your problem, but I do agree that if you are on the pill, you should check with your DR for sure. Good luck!
RadikulRam 16
#3 - Yeah, because a womens personality dose not change at all during that point.
doctorhook86 25
111: If I pretend you weren't being sarcastic, you're right.
disengaged 6
I was on the pill, and yes it's safe to skip a period, but not repeatedly. I was told I can skip two or three in a row and then I had to go back to normal for a few months
stinewd 9
And if you're NOT on The pill, there's another pill that can delay your period. It's quite handy, if you're going on vacation or something.
RadikulRam 16
#158: Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) (also called PMT or premenstrual tension) is a collection of physical and emotional symptoms related to a woman's menstrual cycle. I know FML users absolutely hate anything which may seen offensive in anyway whatsoever, to women, but it's true and it does exist. Use Google before forming your own opinions.
chamallow_fml 16
#251, yes it does exist, doesn't mean ALL women experiment ALL the symptoms at EVERY cycle. And copying and pasting the first line of a Wikipedia article doesn't make you an expert on a subject.
chamallow_fml 16
Don't mind this comment, I thought the first one didn't appear.
Osito2011 9
Sounds like someone his getting his red wings soon. Also he might be taking a trip to fudge land Ohioooo
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Bloody hell. Talk about horrible biological timing.
everydayFML2121 5
Time for aaaannnnnaaaaalllll!!!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
NO.
mduffy08 8
No means yes.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
^Future convicted sexual predator.
mduffy08 8
Convicted implies I will be caught. Muhahaha
SqueakyChipmunk 22
You are one scary mother ******.
RacerX1695 1
I heard this thing about women and having their cycles sync up, maybe OP should get some cool new friends and hope her cycles sync with theirs… instead of vice versa.
mduffy08 8
I will find you...
zombiebombatron 6
Haha I bet you don't have a girlfriend.
Pelvispresley 8
No one should ever have to do that. Period.
doctorhook86 25
81: What about gay people?
alikayanna 0
Lol this made me chuckle.
alikayanna 0
Lol wow! I didn't know guys knew so many interesting tidbits about periods.
malfanese 6
Yeah... It is a bloody hell- for him if they do it anyway!
PenguinSwag47 0
Menstruation jokes are not funny. Period.
Astroman129 7
Hopefully this didn't cause your happiness to flow away.
ebfbruh 0
Some1 explain to me how this comment even makes sense.
BubbleGrunge 18
Hope your boyfriend isn't afraid to sail the red seas...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
If I were a guy, I'd be terrified.
SkoomaKi 28
This is a prime opportunity for OP to earn his Red Wings. After all, a real man loves his woman every day of the month ;D If you don't know what I'm talking about, I warn you when you look it up.
SkoomaKi 28
Sorry, OP's boyfriend*
Redoxx_fml 22
Even the Dorthraki cant cross that sea
woainishamu 21
Take the dirt road home.
Ray_of_midnight 23
I *am* a guy and I actually kinda like period sex. I've had more than one girlfriend who got extra-horny that time of the month. One swore that the orgasms helped her godawful cramps.
seandaniel13 2
If the river runs red take the dirt track
thiscrazything 1
Forget the dirt road, stay clean and do it in the shower.
IndianGiver 8
Theres other ways to enjoy the moment when he gets back home. There's oral, anal, & a hand job. But the real thing is that if he really loves you and you're not into that period sex shit, he can wait...... PAHAHAHA that was funny! No, seriously, time to make a very important decision.
nabee26 15
91- It's true that sex can help relieve painful cramps, so she was telling the truth! :)
Enslaved 38
There's something now on the market called "Soft Cups". It advertises that you can now have "clean sex". You insert it like a diaphragm and it covers your cervix and can be wore up to 12 hours. ***I tried it recently and it works great. Only down side is it can be messing when changing it. Change it the shower and then you'll have no more problems.(: Remember this comment and you'll all thank me for it. I no longer fear having my period!
doctorhook86 25
152: Did you really fear your period before?
Enslaved 38
Let me put it this way: I no longer view my period as a burden when I want to get intimate. My periods never stopped me but now I don't have to "fear" it looking like the elevator scene from "The Shining"!
JurassicHole 5
I don't get why some guys get all grossed out by the blood...you're wearing (or should be) a condom, plus generally girls are hornier around they're periods and it feels even better since it relieves their cramps.
sportcrazychick4 7
They do help with cramps and my ex boyfriend loved it. Doing it in the bathroom was a normal though.
iloveryan052710 8
It does help with cramps :)
iloveryan052710 8
It does help with cramps :)
free2speak 14
I have trouble orgasming (mostly stress-- damn you med school) but I can ****** easily during my period because of the lubrication from the light blood flow and the relatively less worry concerning getting pregnant. I allow my boyfriend to cum inside me during my period but I'm really paranoid about it on other "normal" days, even though Im on the pill. I don't lubricate easily and I absolutely HATE lubricants. I would never do it during heavy flow, though. Plus, I'll agree with other women. something about that time of the month just makes me crave sex! :D
tweetbaby14 18
212, people have gotten pregnant by having sex on their periods.... Bleeding =/= no possibility of pregnancy.
whogivesafuck88 10
That's actually true. Really gross but true. The only way is in the shower in my opinion.
Allysmo 6
The reason your gf was extra horny during that time us because girls are the most fertile during their period… it's the body's way of trying to reproduce
onlychildFTW 34
Awwe that really sucks OP. but I'm sure it won't be that bad at all. That's just bad luck. FYL OP, FYL. Who knows maybe he won't mind a little red. You never know.
xXUND3ADcityXx 0
I actually think its f OP's bf's life lol
Redoxx_fml 22
"What're you drinking?" "Cranberry juice." "What is it your period?"
bigtaytay 13
I feel worse for the boyfriend lol
jgriff79 23
That's a bloody shame!
Inheritance 10
Or as Ron Weasley would say, "Bloody hell"
JurassicHole 5
184 - That's a British slang term...not just what "Ron Weasley" says. It's the equivalent of when Americans say "****" or "******* hell" etc. Sounds a lot more classy though.
Inheritance 10
Was also reference to the fact OP has her period on the month her bf comes back and periods can be hell
Ilovefutbol 8
Ah, fyl but at least you get to see him!
Mischief109 11
Go on birth control and take the placebo pills when hes not there
falee 5
It's worth asking your dr about. :)
jkmartinjk 16
Yeah this is the best solution.
misvenus000 4
Was just going to add that. There are birth control pills that will help regulate the period once every three months or just take the sugar pills the week he's not there.
alycion 39
I've had to be on continuous for endometriosis. No period. No cramps. No major pms.
skittlesmeep 4
Best way to not have it on the same date
well_thatslife 7
Shower sex
nabee26 15
11 Oops I accidentally thumbed you down-- it's this stupid iPhone app. My apologies. Actually this is a fantastic alternative. Thumbs up!
hiitisbrooke 28
Never read FML's while eating. Especially fries with ketchup.
Docbee 11
Did you take that picture after your 'bloody' red moistnmeal?
hiitisbrooke 28
Yes, yes I did.
smashlee1984 1
Just adjust your birth control or just go on the shot that eliminates your periods :)
thetater5 1
Don't go on the depo shot unless you like stress fractures and osteoporosis after 12 months being on that crao.
coolbrony12 3
That would scare her boyfriend if he didn't have her period.
Jaxx66 21
13- I've known three women who got that shot... Swore by that shot, and then found a man to marry and waited till the allotted 'time' for it to dissipate.... Four years later, two still don't have their period and all can't get pregnant.