Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I bought my crush a bouquet of roses plus one fake. The line was going to be, "I'll stop loving you when the last rose dies." I told my best friend and he thought it was such an amazing idea that he stole the fake rose and gave it to her himself. Guess who got the girl. FML
Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML
Empathy
Today, my boyfriend sent me a bouquet of roses with a message attached. The message said, "Ever since your dog died you've stopped putting out, so I think we should break up." FML
Today, I got a rose from my boyfriend. The card read, "It's over." FML
Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML
So brave…
Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML
Mixed signals
Today, my boyfriend surprised me with a bouquet of flowers he'd picked himself. This would’ve been romantic, had they not all been Poison Hemlock. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML
Today, I received a bunch of flowers from my 'lover'. This would be fine, except that I don't have a lover, and my boyfriend now thinks I'm cheating. FML
Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML
Top comments
Shelbyyyyyyy 4
At least you got roses.
bbedlock_fml 7
That's an, um, creative way to break up with someone.
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Comments (123)
Shelbyyyyyyy 4
At least you got roses.
Keyman1212 14
Damn straight. Roses can be pretty expensive in this economy!
OriginalimoaN 15
You should replace a real rose with a fake one:P or cut your loses and find a guy who actually wants to be with you.
yeti0718 8
Have one dipped in wax, then it won't die.
peonmvc 6
See, that's what crazy people do when they can't handle a relationship ending.
xmaximusx 12
Bah u poor thing hahahahahaha u probably deserved it anyways
Riya2595 15
Or you could put it in a freezer.
illabye 0
You should of replaced a rose with a fake one. Then call him up and be like "baby you're so sweet I found the fake one"
thatgirlinoregon 21
You can also freeze-dry them to preserve them, my stepmom did this for the roses one time in memory of a friend. That being said, I'd toss those suckers in the oven or fireplace, whichever is closest. It would cut off a few days with that douchecanoe.
hellbilly205 17
No matter what OP does to the roses to preserve them i bet he will still break up with her...
bwinski 19
Doesnt matter had roses
ALpein 0
@41 And this is why no one likes you.
Parisgirl34 12
ya atleast you got flowers, enjoy those last days together
bbedlock_fml 7
That's an, um, creative way to break up with someone.
Roevera 14
Frick.. Its like giving your 2 week notice at work.. Just drop him now and tell your (ex)boyfriend, not to worry, cause you'll be over him before the last one dies.
DrMime 10
You can even take it a step further with the two thousand dollar, diamond-covered 'Departure ring'! Tell that special girl that you hate her and are soon leaving, on one knee. And if you're not completely satisfied, we'll throw in a free shmedding! Why not be officially broken up with by a minister, in front of all your peers!!!
lebronesque73091 12
A romantic gesture undone by a mean one.
UnleashedKilla1 4
I beilive you mean your ex?
bjdavey 8
18- merc sls FTW!
steven107 7
You still got a lot of time to save up.
Ardos 3
I believe you need a spell check.
jacob4592 0
Wow the love today js sad-_- sorry I hope he changes and gets the fake one when you don't know it
ninjuh_wingman 29
Least you know how long you have.
happle 21
Breaking up with someone shouldn't be creative... It should be serious and respectful.
MiSo_Delek 7
He's obviously not worth your time OP. If anything you should be glad this asshole is out of your life now, rather than later on
philitron128 0
Why is he an asshole? That's the most romantic break up I've ever header of..
teameminem 2
How is that in any way romantic? He got her hopes up by making her think he was sweet and thoughtful enough to do the rose thing, and he took it as a chance to break her heart. I hope that her next boyfriend doesn't have the same idea, because that would not go over well.
Climaxx 11
I'd say roses are pretty darn respectful..
Mirorbo 27
Is the Jerk of the Year contest going on right now? I swear it comes around earlier and earlier!
cscott3131 0
What a prick...