Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said I was way too good at sex so I must have lied about not having much experience, and he "wouldn't be with someone who is hiding something." WTF? FML
Today, my boyfriend decided he's asexual and dumped me on the spot. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he's convinced wearing boxer briefs instead of panties makes me a lesbian. FML
Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
Today, my boyfriend lied about having herpes, and used it as an excuse to dump me. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for a guy. I was the only one who knew he was bisexual. Now everyone thinks I "turned him gay." FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he insists I bit his penis during sex, and that I'm a crazy, man-hating psycho. It’s not true, I’ve just not given many blowjobs before, my technique stinks, and my teeth touched his skin a little. FML
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
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Top comments
kianaaa32 17
Count it as a blessing that he broke up with you, you don't want to be with someone that stupid anyways.
thomas5915 16
Well it sounds like he wouldn't know what to do with it anyway. Find a guy that does
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Comments (272)
kdm_km1 19
umm it is. the ******** is an un-formed penis do to the lack of a y chromosome.so instead of developing into a man it remained in developed and you are a woman.
tsizzleisback 3
U know that a clit is made from the same erectile tissue as the penis, so he's kinda right in a way
Vidimus 13
Actually, the ******** and the penis are analogs. As a fetus, you start out with a structure that would, in layman's terms, be "both." Once the genes start being fully expressed later in the pregnancy for either male or female, then either it will shrink to become the ********, or grown to become the penis. Same goes for your labia and testicles.
enikhen_96 0
Danggg you're smart haha fun fact of the day: your clit is actually a penis
rita91 5
Lol he's an idiot just be glad you know now because conversations in the future would have been extremely difficult
GoBoulder 20
Fun fact: the penis and the ******** are both derived from the same embryonic tissue. They differentiate in the presence/absence of testosterone. Go ahead, down vote me. FYL, OP.
ohSNAPyall 27
One year later... "Why are all the women I date secretly hermaphrodites?!"
OkitaCockroach 19
Well, technically, it is.
DirkNJ 2
What a little prick he is
kthsdm 12
He is right you know? A ******** is a vestigial penis. It has erectile tissue and derived from same germ layer during differentiation
withered 30
#244 So basically every person on this planet is a hermaphrodite because penis develops from ******** and they are similar? I don't think you know what hermaphrodite means.
awhhhyeah 1
Turns out you have more balls than he does... But...you know....the metaphorical ones.