Today, my boyfriend canceled his plans to attend my father's wake, not even 10 minutes after he found out there won't be any alcohol on offer. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend stood me up. At dinner with his parents. FML
Today, my boyfriend went to work instead of going to my father's funeral. He works at home and chooses his own hours. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, I am completely mortified. At my father-in-law's funeral, my husband put a bottle of beer on the coffin and announced to the room his dad was such a tight-fisted sod, it was the first drink he’d ever had on him. FML
Today, I found out that I'm not welcome at my boyfriend's dad funeral, because his ex-wife has invited herself, and it would be too awkward to explain to his extended family, most of whom apparently don't yet know that he's divorced. FML
Today, I canceled our wedding that was scheduled for tomorrow because my fiancee's father passed away unexpectedly this morning. She got furious when I told her, because she still wanted to go through with it, and said that her dad would have wanted us to. Now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me grief about my drinking. This would be fine, if he were sober. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because of my drunken antics. My reaction? Pour myself a stiff drink. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text, right after I finished cleaning his apartment and dropping off a bunch of booze I bought for a big party we were having. It turns out that big party was his "newly single" party. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he couldn't come to my grandfather's funeral because he was at his cottage and couldn't make it. Later that day, when driving home from the graveyard I saw him walking down the street, with another girl. FML
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Top comments
HelloooooNurse 20
Not gonna say break it off, but this may make you want to think very hard about him.
Rosebudx 32
Cancel your plans to be his girlfriend?
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Comments (78)
ThePols 11
You mean your now ex.. Right?
mooman36 15
Right, I have Aspergers so not entirely sure what's wrong with this one. Why would I want to go to a wake with a bunch of people I don't know for a bloke I don't really know if there isn't any advantage to me? If there was alcohol available I'd go to it if someone wanted me to go since I wouldn't find it as boring. As there wasn't then why would I go to something I won't enjoy? I'd be bored, there'd be a bunch of people who are sad and I wouldn't care about them being sad and so would almost guaranteed to come off as insensitive to them. (A fault I know, I really do try and not to but I find it almost impossible to pull off caring about how people feel).
iwadasn 33
What's wrong with it is that when you're in a relationship, you don't just think about yourself. Even if something isn't to your advantage, you do it to help your partner--in this case, OP's boyfriend should be providing her emotional support at this very difficult time. If he's absolutely unable to put someone else's needs above his want for alcohol, then he shouldn't be in a relationship at all.
rifletwirler92 15
It's exactly what 30 said, it's not about you, it's about showing support for your partner in a difficult time. Refusing to go just because there isn't any alcohol just makes you come across as callous and uncaring, certainly not qualities of a good significant other.
skittyskatbrat 19
In a relationship, it's important to think about what the other person needs. She will be very upset that her father died. People don't go to a funeral because of the dead... they go for the living. To support each other, mourn together, remember together. She's going to be unhappy, upset, and even if it is "happy" it will emotionally exhausting. As her boyfriend, he's supposed to be there to support her. Big events, such as graduation, celebrating a promotion, a death, the birth of a niece or nephew or little sibling, need to be celebrated by both parts of a relationship. One person provides emotional support and understanding and encouragement to the other person, who will be highly emotional one way or another. Even injuries require support; someone with a broken ankle or severe food poisoning should be able to rely on their partner to take them to the hospital, even if it is inconvenient for the partner. He is avoiding his responsibilities in a social contract with his girlfriend ONLY because it doesn't sound fun. This only works if she also avoids her responsibilities and they have agreed on it beforehand. And he has not. So he is being selfish.
mooman36 15
I think I understand, probably don't but it seems to make sense. Sounds a nightmare though. Challenging thing is probably knowing how to do that caring bit. Icecream and hugs would be my guess. You see it's reasons like this I don't think I'd be any good in a relationship! Thank you all for you responses though! Certainly enlightening.
skittyskatbrat 19
Meet the right person who understands Aspergers. Tell them you want to help but don't know how and flat-out ask them what they need you to do. Teachers are a REALLY good bet for finding the right person to settle down with. We've all taught about ASD, how to recognize the signs, strengths and weaknesses, and how to interact! Many of us will "get it" and know what you are trying to say or do :)
DanielleinDC 34
If you were in a relationship and a relative died, wouldn't you want your significant other with you during some or all of the funerary rites? And it's one thing to admit you wouldn't feel comfortable going a wake because you didn't know anyone there and another to cancel your plans to go because there's not going to be any booze served. OP could have used her boyfriend's presence and support to get through what must be a very difficult time, and he's behaving like a jerk.
SmoothPancakes 10
A wake without alcohol is a shitty wake and guaranteed to be boring as ****.
iwadasn 33
Most people don't go to wakes and funerals for the entertainment.
uhohitslisa2 20
I'm not going to tell you to end it, but at least think about it. You should definitely talk to him about it though. OP. Also, sorry for your loss.
jbulgatz 2
I'm sorry but no guy wants to do that and wouldn't unless y'all were married.
crudeandrudeguy 29
How about you don't appoint yourself speaker for all guys...
Mandy_Hime 6
Sheesh..Whats more important to him? A girlfriend who needs support after loosing her father, or some booze? Oh and #54, I have Aspergers myself, so I admit while I was younger, I didn't understand supporting someone who went though a loss over someone I didn't know too well..But just because someone is a stranger to you doesn't mean that person probably isn't a friend or a family member to someone else. And the loss of the person would had affected someone else in a way, like the writer was with her father here
mooman36 15
See I can't do empathy at all. Or at least I don't recognise it if I do. Did you find that and are you better at it now? Is it something that you can work on? I'm 24 now and still can't do it.
DanielleinDC 34
It's something you have to work on. I'm Aspie myself and while I do well in some situations, I suck at others. I also didn't realize I was Aspie until I hit my late 30s.
classycoop 12
What's a wake? Was he doing a wake boarding party?
NamelessFace 22
Selfish jerk. He could at least be subtle about it, but no, not even the decency to do that.
beardedbeard 4
That's disrespectful OP. have a serious talk with them.
daughternature 7
I'm not going to say "dump his dumbass" or anything along those lines. But you should really let him know how you feel about what he said.