Today, my boyfriend and I had sex in the same bed my dog pooped in because we were both too polite to ask the other person why they smelt like shit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML
Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex, but every time he thrust into me, he farted. Loud, smelly, wet farts. After a minute, I shoved him off and demanded he take a dump. After a full five minutes of loud diarrhea, he came back to bed, his ass stinking of sewage. My pussy dried up so fast… FML
Today, my dog peed on my bed because my parents were presumably having sex and I was too scared to go downstairs and take her out because of it. FML
Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML
Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was finally time for both of us to have sex with each other. He kept his shoes on the whole time because he thought he had smelly feet. FML
Today, I was napping with my boyfriend and his dog. The dog was making odd coughing noises, but my boyfriend refused to kick him out of the bed. A few moments later, I rolled onto my stomach, into a pile of dog vomit. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, my wife and I were getting intimate with for the first time in a while, as I haven't been home, when the foul stench of our dog's fart made us gag. Mood ruined. FML
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Top comments
kristinjeaneen 21
There needs to be a YDI option here. You're gross for sleeping with someone who smells like feces.
WeirdUS 30
You thought the other person smelled like shit and you still slept with them ? neither of you suggest to the other person maybe take a shower? Gross
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Comments (38)
Ashlilyx19 6
Everyone has days where they don't smell as good as they should. I guess op and her boyfriend are understanding about each other. But perhaps maybe they should have had some shower foreplay if it smelled that much like shit.
thearronaut 10
YDI
Zebediabolical 45
If you're too polite to ask the other person why they smell like shit, you can always suggest some shower sex.It gets the hint across without being mean. And showersex. Mmmmmmmmm. :D
Kitsi 14
This definitely is 100% YDI. I don't care if it didn't have the button. You both smelled literal shit and kept going anyway? Best case scenario one of you accidentally shafted. I can't come up with any good outcomes for smelling excrement.
night_roane 11
As a married woman, let me give you some advice. If something smells like shit, you say, "What smells like shit?!" Even if it winds up being his breath. Prevents you from ever having dog-poo sex and will only destroy an extremely feeble relationship.
Namenlos_fml 20
Love is in the air!.... well.... something is in the air
aelarol 5
Human and dog shit smell very different. You guys need to eat better. Seriously.
latenerd 11
Sorry, but YDI. First, if something seems shitty during sex, ASK about it. Second, always blame weird smells on the dog (or cat) first. Any pet lover knows that.
quarterweek 13
Ew. That's a total YDI moment.
squiros 2
at least you know that the other person is both polite and willing to put up with shit - even if it's not your shit. if you're both still attracted to each other enough to have sex despite the presence of feces, when there aren't feces, it'll likely be the best sex ever. this seems like a win, actually, at least in the long term.