Today, my boyfriend and I had sex in the same bed my dog pooped in because we were both too polite to ask the other person why they smelt like shit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML
Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex, but every time he thrust into me, he farted. Loud, smelly, wet farts. After a minute, I shoved him off and demanded he take a dump. After a full five minutes of loud diarrhea, he came back to bed, his ass stinking of sewage. My pussy dried up so fast… FML
Today, my dog peed on my bed because my parents were presumably having sex and I was too scared to go downstairs and take her out because of it. FML
Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML
Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was finally time for both of us to have sex with each other. He kept his shoes on the whole time because he thought he had smelly feet. FML
Today, I was napping with my boyfriend and his dog. The dog was making odd coughing noises, but my boyfriend refused to kick him out of the bed. A few moments later, I rolled onto my stomach, into a pile of dog vomit. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, my wife and I were getting intimate with for the first time in a while, as I haven't been home, when the foul stench of our dog's fart made us gag. Mood ruined. FML
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Top comments
kristinjeaneen 21
There needs to be a YDI option here. You're gross for sleeping with someone who smells like feces.
WeirdUS 30
You thought the other person smelled like shit and you still slept with them ? neither of you suggest to the other person maybe take a shower? Gross
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Comments (38)
Gngr_Grl 26
Ew.
WeirdUS 30
You thought the other person smelled like shit and you still slept with them ? neither of you suggest to the other person maybe take a shower? Gross
Demon_of_Light 27
What confuses me more is that you are aware that you own a dog, yet when smelling poop, you don't even consider that it might not be your partner.
kristinjeaneen 21
There needs to be a YDI option here. You're gross for sleeping with someone who smells like feces.
Catdragon 40
it can't even happen to me because I don't have a dog or sex.
liinkinparkfan97 34
OP clearly said their dog pooped on the bed, not that the boyfriend smelt like poop.
Oceanborn_fml 24
OP clearly said they both thought the other smelled like shit.
atradr 8
But OP didn't know that at the time, #8.
Sevarog 13
But there is one...
Xquisite1 28
#26 There wasn't a YDI option at first. It was originally "that could've happened to anyone". apparently FML staff changed it.
yerawizardlizzy 27
Yeah it seems every time someone comments this I have the button on my app. They must be going back and changing them.
rinzlerkitty94 31
They have a "That could have happened to anyone" button while FMLs are being moderated.
devinaww 15
Are you both Canadian?
samomaha 17
LOL! I was sipping my ice water when I read this. I think I just waterboarded by monitor!
purplepixie23 16
Canadians are polite yes, but not stupid thank you.
liinkinparkfan97 34
YDI since you knew there was dog poo in the bed and you couldn't even be decent enough to say something. That's pretty disgusting.
Nat52482 25
I'm assuming they didnt find the poop until after they were done and looked at the bed or something. they didn't speak up at first because they didn't want to ask if it was the other person that smelled to avoid being rude or ruining the time.
liinkinparkfan97 34
I still would have spoken up about it. It probably could have been much more enjoyable if it didn't smell like dog poop.
RichardPencil 32
That is some great "powering through adversity" to complete the sex act! I almost want to quit if she coughs!
tamesenicole 27
Says a lot bout you
danm19 15
Are you sure you didn't poop the bed
pandaxpress 19
Sometimes it's okay to be blunt and say, "Hey it smells like dog shit in here." I mean how does that not kill the mood?
Lalala579121 28
Too much Tubgirl, that's how.
WeirdUS 30
If that didn't kill the mood I dunno. I get being polite but damn. You got a wonder how low was the bar set.
pandaxpress 19
#24 I think that bar was practically non-existent.
baybkayks 18
Sounds a little like you guys aren't comfortable enough with eachother. I understand that it's not necessarily easy to approach someone questioning their hygiene because they might take offense, but if you can't ask an honest question to the person you're sleeping with... Then idk, OP. You need to establish mutual understanding with eachother so you can discuss these things openly and without fear of judgement to avoid issues like this in the future.