Today, my best friend told me he loved me, so I reminded him that I'm a lesbian. "That's just a phase, just wait till you suck my dick," was his reply. He was serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML
Today, my best friend who I have been secretly in love with forever, was ranting about her ex-girlfriend. Then she said : "If only you were gay, we'd be perfect for each other." I took the chance to tell her I was. She responded : "Well, I'm still not attracted to you though." FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend. After admitting to me that he's gay, I gave him a hug for support and comfort, feeling his erection on my upper thigh. FML
Today, after confessing my love for my best friend, he looked at me and said "I'm not feeling it. But does this mean we can have sex?" FML
Today, I told my best friend that I was gay and that I liked him. Turns out he's very open about the topic. Basically, he kissed me and then slapped me. I don't know what that's supposed to mean. FML
Today, I told my best friend of 10 years that somewhere along the way I fell in love with him and I think we should be together. His response? "I appreciate the sentiment." FML
Today, I was driving my best friend home when he admitted to being gay. I was glad he could trust me with a secret like this. Until he admitted to having sex with my boyfriend. FML
Today, I finally gave the guy I was with for over a year a blowjob. Right after he tells me "I don't want a girlfriend but I want you to be my best friend." FML
Today, my lesbian best friend told me she might be bi and wanted to try sex with a guy she trusts, AKA me. She eventually convinced me, but after we'd had 'weird best friend sex' she decided she’s a lesbian after all, and I “took advantage of her temporary confusion,” so we’re not friends anymore. WTF? FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
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Top comments
Phil 14
Just tell him that liking girls is just a phase for him, wait til he sucks a dick.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Before using your mouth, I'd suggest using your foot. In a kicking motion. At speed.
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Comments (24)
acmariner99 25
“Best friend,” right. Normally I don’t condone a baseball bat to the balls, but in this case I might make an exception
KittyMack 13
Two important facts to note here. One, no he doesn't love you. FFS if he did he would show more respect, and more evidence that he really gets you. And two, he's not your best friend, he's not even your friend. Sounds like you basically got catfished- some creep wore the mask of a delightful fella, and pretended to become your best friend, while secretly, he was just another Nice Guy with the delusion that chicks have to put out if a guy puts in enough time. As if hanging with us is so dreadful there needs to be a reward. Do I sound bitter? Yeah I gave my time, trust, loyalty & sisterly love to a few guys in my youth who were just lecherous dysfunctional misogynists trying to manipulate me. Hurts a lot to discover you let someone into your life & heart who barely even considers you a person. It's a dirty trick and dudes like that should all go die in a fire.
pins91 27
Yes! This! All of this!
cdaspirit 15
Tell him he was right and suck his dick but use teeth
Alessa Noriega 5
I hope you socked him on the nose
DonULFonso 22
What a charmer...
kieralumina 30
Yikes. time to get a less gross best friend
Fiona Ashe 9
That is NOT your best friend.
PhoenixChick 26
"Oh, wow, the only thing you have to offer a woman sexually is the opportunity to give YOU an ******? That's your big lesbian bait? That you will do her the honor of coming in her mouth? How god-awful terrible of a **** are you that you can't even try to hypothetically pleasure a woman to tempt me? All you can offer is hot cum? Gee, I could pleasure someone i'm not attracted to, or receive pleasure from someone I am attracted to...decisions decisions...nope, still a lesbian"
ojosRojos 28
Best friend? I’m a better friend to you and I don’t even know you. Kick that guy to the curb and let’s be friends instead :)